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Ole Miss Will Most Likely Begin Coaching Search Today
Posted by Thomas the Terrible on November 26, 2007
Today’s date is 2 A.0. (after 0) for the Ole Miss football program. For the second time in four years, Ole Miss has really screwed themselves royally by firing their football coach. When I learned about this my first thought was “That’s a mistake he’s only been there 3 years”, my second thought was “I wonder if Jai Eugene of ‘Losers With Socks‘ will have to change his aviator now”. The first time involved the firing of David Cutcliff after so much success he brought them, the latest firing involves the man, the myth, the legend, the man-god with 42″ python arms Coach 0, just after a poultry 3 years there. Three years? Are you kidding me?
Coach 0′s firing comes on the heels after Chancellor Robert Khayat endorsed Orgeron last month. Khayat told the AP that Coach 0′s job was safe and he believed the coach would eventually field a winner, even if it took five or six years. In that same interview Khayat also showed some rather unnatural man-love towards the 0. Those details can be found here.
So now after Ole Miss has shown the SEC that they too can be like Alabama & Notre Dame, and fire a coach after a relatively short period of time. The search should begin today. Let’s look at some candidates that could possibly become the next Ole Miss football coach.
David Cutcliff: Oh wait my bad. Not only would the athletic director have to get on his knees and beg him to return, he would also have to tongue his balls in the process.
Bo Pelini: HA! You think he’ll go there over Nebraska? Bahahahaha.
OK OK OK here’s the real list, I was just kidding on the first two.
- Rick Neuheisel: He hasn’t been coaching for awhile now. In fact I’m not even sure if he’s still alive, but if they can find him and sober him up it possible.
- Mike Shula: Why not? He was wrongly canned last year so getting fired again within another 3 years wouldn’t be a new experience.
- Gary Barnett: He can enticed recruits to come to Ole Miss with sex and alcohol during recruiting visits & actually coach as well, he’s a winner.
- Coach Fran: Wait even Ole Miss wouldn’t stoop that low.
- Bill Callahan: He can win more than 3 times a year.
- Gus Malazan: This could be a real win-win here. The “I’ll whip your ass in the parking lot” looks he would throw towards Houston Nutt is worth the admission price alone.
- Kevin O’Dea: Don’t know a lot about him but he is a coach with the Chicago Bears. The cool thing about him is people can still keep their Coach O decals on their cars.
- Me: That’s right bitches m-e ME! I have no clue on how to coach, but neither did Coach 0 and that’s didn’t stop him. For a generous salary I’ll coach that team or at least teach Jerrell Powe how to read. I’ll employ my patented motivational tools to the job. A whistle and cattle prod.
Hire Kevin O’Dea
So take your pick Ole Miss but remember I have a cattle prod and I’m not afraid to use it bitch.
So I profess on this day 11/26/07
TtT
TideDruid said
Ole Miss fans are tracking jets today. Currently, the jet has landed in Opelika, Alabama. Will Muschamp perhaps?
lawvol said
I figure old Terry Bowden is next up…
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- lawvol: http://Gate21.net – Life, the Universe, & College Football
Bulletin Board Material… « Gate 21 said
[...] On the departure of Ed Ogeron (a/k/a “Foghorn Leghorn”): Ole Miss Will Most Likely Begin Coaching Search Today « Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain [...]
Jai Eugene said
nice photoshop
Ed O said
Ole Miss will get Muschamp or Houston Nutt. Roll Tide!