Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Spurrier’s Mantra of be Like Florida Effect the Wrong Gamecock Players

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 2, 2008


Going into Spurrier’s fourth season at South Carolina one mantra has been clear and that is “Be like Florida.” Recruit, practice, play & break the law like a Gator and you can win like a Gator.

Over the past three years Spurrier’s players have attempted this mantra only to fail. Several arrests for underage drinking (one the finally landed the greatest Gamecock recruit out of a scholarship), the keying of a professors car, a few simple possession arrests & two fights in which two Gamecock players were winning only to be stabbed do not measure up to the motto “Great law breakers make great football players.”

Now the message seems to be finally sinking in. Two Gamecocks are starting to understand this message & damn it they could be fine football players for the Ole Ball (Sac) Coach and USC. Just one slight problem…the players are women and football ain’t their sport, basketball is.

Jasmine Payne (left), Ashlie Billingslea

18-year-old Jasmine Payne and 19-year-old Ashlie Billingslea, both freshman guards, were arrested after a search of a dorm room in South Quad dormitory by campus po po.

Check out the list of crimes they’re charged with;

  • Credit card theft
  • Credit card fraud
  • Petit larceny
  • Two counts of possession with intent to distribute crack cocaine in proximity to a school
  • Two counts of possession with intent to distribute marijuana in proximity to a school

This might be the straw that breaks the camels back. It’s bad enough that USC football players can’t break the law like Florida but the USC Lady Gamecocks certainly can.

Per university policy, both players have been suspended from the team. Gamecocks coach Susan Walvius declined comment Tuesday through a team spokesperson.

“According to university policy, when something like that happens the student-athlete is suspended from team activities, and we just proceed from there,” team spokesperson Diana Koval said. “As a department and staff, we don’t have any other comment but that.”

The Ole Ball (Sac) Coach also chimed in.

“This is a tragedy that two young women with such potential can do such a thing. It’s tragic because my dang’um boys are to lazy or scared to be real superstars. Christ on a shingle even the women are beating us now.”

2 Responses to “Spurrier’s Mantra of be Like Florida Effect the Wrong Gamecock Players”

  1. MoonDog said

    South Carolina and Alabama will provide the players for the SEC’s first annual “All Convict Team.”

  2. [...] like Spurrier needs to be recruiting from the womens basketball program at South Cackalacka and that Mother Nature is a Red Sox Fan — Your Mother Slept With Wilt [...]

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