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Archive for April 15th, 2008

Herschel Walker is a Skitzo Who Knew? Updated!

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 15, 2008

First off to all the Georgia fans that read this blog (except John) I apologize in advance for this post, but it’s just too good a story not to ridicule.

Georgia football legend and College football God Herschel Walker has a new book coming out. In it he states he’s a skitzo. Which begs the question which personality was the one that could read?

Yeah, I’m really going to believe Herschel Walker wrote a book…

Some of Walker’s closest friends are all saying the same thing:

“I’m probably one of his closest friends and that’s news to me,” Frank Ros, a Coca-Cola executive who played linebacker and was captain of Georgia’s 1980 national championship team, told the Journal-Constitution. “I knew he was working on a book but I just thought it was about football. He does 100 things at once and always has projects going on but that blows me away.”

“That’s all news to me,” former Georgia coach Vince Dooley said. “All I know is whatever personality he had when he had the football was the one I liked.”

That’s classic Dooley I love it.

The titled “Breaking Free” chronicles Walker’s life with multiple personality disorder.

Since I spent several years as a medical underwriter I can tell you that every book like the Merck Manual of Medical Information to the BC/BS Underwriting Manual will tell you the same thing, and that is there is no multiple personality disorder: the term was retired in 1994. A person who really has Dissociative Identity Disorder would show at least 3 distinct aspects to their personality, not 2. This is very very rare, and not something under voluntary control. It is hard to imagine that he would have been able to hide this for all the years he was in the public eye.

As for this being a mental illness, well that term actually doesn’t exist, just look in a medical dictionary & you won’t find it. They are technically mental disorders, but that’s a subject for another day.

Now I’m somewhat sensitive to mental illness, and if he really does have this disorder I feel bad for him and I hope he gets help. However I find it interesting that we only hear about this when he has a book to sell and he’s trying to make money. We’ve never heard this before, and the guy has been retired for what, a dozen years now? All of a sudden he has a book coming out and then we hear about this.

If this is true then it’s no wonder Minnesota traded so many players to get him.

Some of the personalities featured in the book are:

Eve from the “Three Faces of Eve”

A sane and responsible Brittney Spears

Some linebacker name Steve whom I’m sure he ran over going to the house.

Donald Trump who bought the USFL team, New Jersey Generals, that Walker played for.

Uga the (insert roman numeral here)

And finally Tim Tebow, which maybe the most violent because he punches himself in the face and yells quit crying you little bitch.

Update 4/15/08

In the just-released book “Breaking Free,” former NFL running back Herschel Walker delves into his excruciating struggles with dissociative identity disorder, saying he tried to manage a dozen alternate personalities and that the condition nearly drove him to suicide.

After his retirement from football in 1997, Walker said the disorder began to overwhelm him. At one point, while sitting in his kitchen, he said he played Russian roulette with a loaded pistol.

“To challenge death like I was doing, you start saying, there’s a problem here,” Walker told ABC News correspondent Bob Woodruff.

“Nightline” interviewed Walker’s therapist, Jerry Mungadze, who said he met Walker’s alternate personalities, or “alters,” during their sessions.

“They will come out and say, I am so-and-so. I’m here to tell you Herschel is not doing too good,” Mungadze said. ” … When he finishes, it would just disappear back in him, and Herschel comes out.”

Walker and his ex-wife, Cindy Grossman (No relation to Rex), were married for 16 years before she knew about his illness the his sheep fetish, she said.

“Well, now it makes perfect sense, because each personality has a different interest,” Grossman told “Nightline.” “This one has an interest in ballet, this one has an interest in the Marines, this one had an interest [in the] FBI, this one had an interest in sports.

“DID is not ‘Sybil’ or ‘Three Faces of Eve.’ DID is just an illness that people are dealing with,” he said. In the book, he wrote, “I feel the greatest achievement of my life will be to tell the world my truth.”

There is a real insightful movie about this disorder called Me, Myself and Irene.

However Big Papa Walker has something to say….

“I know him better than anybody ’cause I raised him,” Willis Walker Sr. told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution at the time. “This is my first knowing about that.”

I find it hard to believe, that in 8 years of therapy, NONE of his personalities ever told his Dad. Bad personalties! Shame on you. He must have changed personalities when he joined the Vikings…He didn’t seem interested in running the rock back then.

I think I’m Michael Jordan everyday but then I check my bank accounts and go brick jumpers in my front yard and come back to reality.

Can I have the disorder too??? I think I’m somebody else all the time….

Just shut up Herschel, all 12 of you!

Now I leave you with this question:

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to commit suicide, is that considered a hostage crisis?

Hey Steve! Herschel and his 12 friends still wanna fight!

Hey Steve! Hershel & his 12 friends still wanna fight!

Posted in SEC Football | Tagged: , , , | 8 Comments »

If Madison Square Garden was a Country Tom Brokaw Wouldn’t mind an US Invasion of it.

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 15, 2008

What’s more pathetic than listening to the Masters XM Satellite Radio instead of watching it? The New York Knicks! I haven’t done an “Isiah Thomas sucks” post in quite awhile I was due.

Tom Brokaw took time to speak with Jim Gray at the Master yesterday but instead of talking about golf, Brokaw took the time a pleasure to rip the Knicks. There is no escaping the worst team money can buy! Here’s a transcript of what was said.

Brokaw: “The NBA, as you know I am a big fan of the NBA…or have been. I am not very happy with it at the moment. I think that they have lost their way.”

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Gray: “Why not…What bothers you?”

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Brokaw: “What bothers me is that a lot of the deportment is inappropriate. You know, off the court, and I think that just four or five exceptions they are not being what they ought to be to the country.”

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Gray: “And you have such a large voice, I’m wondering if you have spoken to the commissioner or team officials.”

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Brokaw: “No…..He certainly knows how I feel about the Knicks…and their ownership. As a season ticket holder for a long time, I won’t renew because I don’t like the attitude that that ownership has brought to the community.”

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Gray: “And you have been in the front row or close to it for a long time.”

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Brokaw: “I was in the front row for a while and then three rows back but not next year. I just think that they have failed their obligation to the city. I think that we have great sports franchises in New York. I think Fred Wilpon of the Mets and George Steinbrenner of the Yankees measure up and they bring to the community winning teams as best they can and make real statements about being supportive of the community. I don’t think that the Dolans have done that and I think the Garden has lost a lot of its luster as a result of their ownership and this is the first time that I have really said that out loud. But I feel very strongly about it and I think that it’s the least we can expect. They get these huge prices for people to sit in those seats, all kinds of tax advantages to owning the Garden and yet they operate as if they were a sovereign country and want to play only by their own rules. So I’m not very happy about that.”

You know it’s serious when someone of Brokaw’s caliber rips you…one can only hope Dolan has heard about it.

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Real Prank Calls to OJ Simpson

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on April 15, 2008

Freaking Classic

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A Week Later & I Am Still Upset

Posted by Joel on April 15, 2008

First off, let me start off by saying congratulations to Kansas for willing the NCAA Men’s Basketball Championship. Their team deserves all the credit because they won.

Let me also congratulate the Memphis Tigers for an amazing season. So close but yet and still so far away.

As the second half began, a funny feeling came over me. Simultaneously, mucus started running out of my nose, and I was cold. I was watching the rest of the game in a blanket and my MacBook burning my lap. So as the game started slipping away, I started getting sicker and sicker. Coincidence, or maybe God once again telling this native Memphian that, once again, this is not your time.

As the next couple of days progressed, I got sicker and sicker, spending more time in bed than a hooker in Amsterdam. Of all the weeks to get flu, and it is in the 80′s outside.

During this time, I watched the second half of the game. There was a common theme each time that I watched. There was one person that stood out as the reason that the Tigers lost the game. Looking back at the season, the Tennessee loss and the near loss to UAB in Birmingham was the fault of one man:

Earlier, when I wrote the college basketball preview, I referenced the lack of John Calipari’s in-game coaching abilities. He can recruit like nobody else. He can spot talent. But sometimes I wonder if he thinks X’s and O’s are part of his favorite childhood game, Tic Tac Toe. The Tigers basically run 3 plays on offense and play a pressing man to man. Billy Packer, the most arrogant mic guy this side of Joe Buck, correctly said that the Tigers should have been running more zone during the championship game. In the semifinal game against UCLA, Pierre Niles should have been bumping uglies against Kevin Love, saving Joey Dorsey for foul trouble (even though Kevin Love choked harder than the Tigers). And for God’s sake, Mario Chalmers SHOULD HAVE BEEN FOULED!!!

Oh, but the Great Calipari said after the game that he told the team to foul before the ball gets to mid-court. I call BS on that one. He is a coach who screams at his players what he wants them to do, and if they don’t, he sits them. The team knows this, and IF he told them to foul, they didn’t listen.

The point being is that the Tigers lost two games because Calipari got outcoached, which happens a lot if you look at his career. Talent alone won the Tigers 30+ games. If there were a better coach on the sidelines, the title would be sitting on Beale St instead of some scarecrow infested wheat field in Kansas, not that I am bitter or anything…

Posted in NCAA, Sports | Tagged: , , , , , , | 4 Comments »