Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Archive for June 9th, 2008

Is Jeremy Shockey a Dick or just a Bitch?

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on June 9, 2008

Jeremy Shockey is threatening not to show up for the New York Giants’ mini-camp this week due to the fact he’s acting like a complete dick or maybe a little bitch. I haven’t decided on which one yet.

“Who knows? I might go to see my mother in Texas. I have no idea,” Shockey said.

Shockey, in New York for a promotional event, shared his crybaby gripes with reporters.

“Unlike the Giants, I’m going to be quiet,” he said. “They’ve released multiple things about myself and if you look back into the media, there’s always a source. Well, I’d like to know who this source is and we’ll go over here and we’ll deal with it ourselves, because I haven’t said one negative thing toward the Giants in the newspapers.”

Shockey was making his first public comments since breaking his leg in December. The Giants went on to beat the Patriots to win the Super Bowl. Afterward, Shockey was a no-show for the team’s victory parade in New York, its visit to the White House and its championship ring ceremony.

So let’s get this straight: he gets injured, misses the rest of the season, Giants go and win the Super Bowl anyway, he skips all of the celebrations, and then might not come to mandatory mini camp. If I were in his position I’d be more concerned about just making the team than anything that has been said about me.

In the weeks leading up to the draft, the New Orleans Saints and several other teams approached the Giants about a trade for the oft-injured Pro Bowler. The Giants listened, but that was it.

Shockey has told friends that he is unhappy with his role, his contract and the notion that the Giants were better without him after he broke his leg in Week 15 because Eli Manning didn’t have the burden of having to pass the ball to Shockey to keep him happy.

How does breaking a leg and missing the playoff run entitle Shockey to a raise one year into a 5 year deal? This guy will never be happy; dumping him would be addition by subtraction.

If he does attend the mini-camp, Shockey said he’ll be limited.

“Obviously. I’m not 100 percent and if I do show to minicamp, it’s going to be, I wouldn’t imagine me doing much, just getting treatment on my leg,” Shockey told reporters.

When he was healthy he ran incorrect routes, dropped numerous passes and pulled childish antics on the sideline. Whined that he wasn’t being used properly and the Giants had a not so terrific offense. He breaks his leg and the next thing we see is the Giants going into Dallas and winning, going to Green Bay and winning, and down to Arizona and laughing at the rest of the NFL. Shockey isn’t the invaluable commodity he thinks he is. The team has won without him. So give him a crying towel and send him somewhere else.

I thought only the receivers were Divas. Shockey was supposed to be a tough guy. The Giants fans are disappointed in him. He should be happy to honor his contract. No one from the Giants was bad mouthing him. His feeling seem hurt because they won a title without him. Grow up.

Posted in Cry Baby, Jeremy Shockey, NFL Football, New York Giants, dumbass | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

Cedric Benson can Still Achieve the Triple Crown

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on June 9, 2008

Now that Big Brown has failed to capture horse racing’s triple crown, attention is now turned to a triple crown chase of another kind: the idiotic dumb ass triple crown. Cedric Benson has established himself as the front runner.

Benson was charged with drunk driving in Austin, Texas, his second arrest in little more than a month.

Let’s see first it’s drinking while operating a boat and now this. If Benson can get caught driving a lawnmower, bicycle or motorcycle then he was achieved the Triple Crown.

What is it with Texas RB’s and getting arrested? Watch out Jamaal Charles…’re next

Benson’s attorney said the former Texas star had a few drinks with dinner but didn’t think he was intoxicated, and cooperated with police.

Still, attorney Sam Bassett acknowledged:

“He’s probably in trouble with his team for breaking curfew and having anything to drink under the circumstances.”

Authorities said Benson was arrested early Saturday after he failed a field sobriety test. The former first-round draft pick was charged with driving while intoxicated and released on bond.

The arrest comes a month after Benson was charged with boating while intoxicated and resisting arrest. He has said neither charge is true, and those cases are pending.

This pretty much invalidates the whole “I did nothing wrong on that boat and the cops are out to get me” defense.

At a fan event at Soldier Field in Chicago on Saturday, Bears general manager Jerry Angelo said he’d not spoken to Benson but called the situation unfortunate.

“Disappointment is too much an often-used word when we’re talking about Cedric, and the number one lesson for every player is protect your job,” Angelo said. “So we’re all held accountable for our actions.”

Asked if the new arrest will weigh against Benson, Angelo said:

“Well, it doesn’t weigh very well. And it’s unfortunate. We will deal with it when we know everything.”

Austin police spokeswoman Veneza Aguinaga said Benson, who was pulled over for running a red light, refused to take a breath test or provide blood samples Saturday. Because innocent people always refuse a breathalyzer.

For the record no one should ever refuse to consent to a breathalyzer. The breathalyzer will not lie. There is no way for a person to alter it to set you up. If you are not drunk or have not been drinking it is very ridiculous to not consent unless you’re drunk.

Benson “NO officer *hiccup* I’m not as think as you drunk I am!!!”

Bassett said Benson thought the light was yellow when he went through around 2 a.m., though he stopped immediately when police appeared. Bassett said Benson told him he wasn’t speeding or driving recklessly.

“He doesn’t feel like he was intoxicated,” Bassett said. “He said he had two or three drinks the whole night with dinner.”

Bassett said Benson’s girlfriend was with him at the time. The two had dined at a Japanese restaurant earlier. The running back was in Austin for his mother’s birthday this weekend, Bassett said.

Coach Lovie Smith said he was inclined to give Benson the benefit of the doubt “like everyone else in society gets.”

“That’s what we’ll do with this thing,” Smith said.

It’s only a matter of time until Benson tries to make it rain in a strip club.

The boat incident was not enough reason to cut him, but now it’s time. Bears fans are not going to accept this guy any more.

All I can say is: What an idiot.

Posted in Cedric Benson, Chicago Bears, DUI, alcoholics, drunk | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »