Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Good Lord Wildcat Fans, Cool Your Jets

Posted by Joel on June 29, 2008

When I wrote this article, I knew it would get a reaction. NEVER did I think it would get this type of reaction, although similar posts about Kentucky basketball have gotten much more traffic than anything else. With that said, instead of responding to every comment, I will post this and let the chips fall where they may…

Regarding my name and avatar, my real name is Joel. I chose to post under my own name because I am my own person. I understand why someone would want to have a different username, but not me. Nothing worng with it in my opinion, but that is how I roll. I chose to use The Pyramid Arena in Memphis because I am a proud native Memphian. I am also proud to be from the great state of Tennessee. Even though I attended Tennessee State University in Nashville (after deciding not to attend Columbia University, Brown University, Morehouse college, or the University of North Carolina, all offering academic scholarships while I was in high school), I still support all things Volunteer and all things regarding Memphis Tiger basketball. Equally, on this site, I have personally made fun of both. Examples of me making fun of Tiger basketball can be found here, here, and here. I do live and die Memphis Tiger basketball, despite the recent heartbreak of the title game and lack of national titles (unlike Kentucky). A few of my favorite posts of satire of Tennessee can be found here, here, and here. There have been other things that we have touched upon, including West Virginia football, Alabama, and the Miami Dolphins during their “run” to futility. Check out the “April Fool’s Day” page .The original and still current mantra of this blog is “A Sports Blog On Why ALL Teams Suck”. It just so happened that I did one on Kentucky, and things went bat shit. Of course, I was hoping people to understand sarcasm but I guess I expected too much.

First off, I do actually work during the day and I am not around a computer until I get home. So if you are pissy about anything I have written, cool it until later in the evening. I am not some snot nosed college kid or an unemployed bum watching Judge Judy and ESPN First Take all day.

Second, the only mistake I made (I feel) is making the title “Wanna be an NBA Player???” It was intended to sarcastically point out that Kentucky hasn’t had an NBA lottery player in a long time and a first round player drafted in a few years. That is a fact, as confirmed by John Clay of the Lexington Herald Ledger (he even called my work crude. I feel honored). But some of you Kentucky fans pointed out how Rajon Rondo just won an NBA championship with Boston and Tayshaun Prince has just been named to the Olympic team. Kudos. The fact of the matter is that Rondo was on a great team and while point guard is an important position, Paul Pierce handled the ball more than any other Celtic during the title run. Thomas the Terrible could have run point guard and the Celtics were still going to win it all. As for Prince, while he has been a valued member of the Pistons, there is no way I would have picked him over Tyson Chandler, Amare Stoudamire, Tim Duncan, Kevin Garnett, or even Paul Pierce. I am not the only one of this opinion.

Here is the bigger issue though: What is the real reason for the swarm of reaction??? Is it because the fanbase of Kentucky basketball is that fragile??? Or, did the truth really hurt??? Let’s look at these two questions.

I understand that it isn’t right to label a whole fanbase one thing when it is the nutjob 1% that cause said fans to be labeled as such. With that being said, Kentucky fans have an elitist view of their program. They are entitled to be the best because of tradition, and every year they should win it all. USC (the one in California that wins championships) has this view when it comes to football. Alabama does too. New York Yankee, Boston Red Sox (yes you too Thomas), Dallas Cowboy, and L.A. Laker fans all are examples of the sports fan “elitist”. Nothing wrong with that, until that sense of superiority crosses the line of obnoxious and unruly behavior. The term “10 Loss” Tubby is a phrase that came from Kentucky fans. The fact that “he couldn’t recruit” and he left the program “in shambles” is a view that I have seen on message boards and I have heard Wildcat fans say time and time again. Yet ironically, the same players that he recruited, and by and large graduated college, are the same players that you are quick to point out are on NBA rosters. Maybe he wasn’t as bad of a coach as some of you thought. No team is gonna win it all every year, hell some don’t even win it once. Which brings me to the next question.

The truth is that the program is down now. Losing to Gardner-Webb should have pointed that out. When I look back at the NCAA basketball landscape over the past few years, Kentucky has not been elite. The truth is that Tubby Smith is a good coach, but other programs have just simply caught up. Rupp Arena can no longer be seen as a recruiting tool, not when you have schools like Pitt, Florida, Tennessee, Stanford, Ohio State, Wisconsin, Maryland and Memphis playing in brand new or renovated stadiums, with beautiful practice facilities to match. Yes, CBS still features Kentucky basketball, but when you have Indiana, Memphis, Duke, North Carolina, Georgetown, UCLA, and Arizona on national TV more than Kentucky, guess where the recruits are gonna go??? Kentucky is not the top dog in the SEC anymore, and seeing as Georgia of all teams won the SEC tournament this past year, Kentucky is, in my opinion, 5th in the SEC East, behind Tennessee, Florida, Vanderbilt, and Georgia. With the exception of Georgia, they had better records than Kentucky. Historically, Kentucky is easily a top 3 program, along with UCLA and North Carolina. Right now, they can’t even get out of the SEC East.

Lastly, I suppose that from some of the comments, some of you guys CLEARLY don’t understand sarcasm, such as this passage:

Oh don’t worry Wildcat fan. I know where to place the blame. It was “10 Loss” Tubby’s fault. He was too busy making sure he ran a clean program, free of racism (unlike the arena named after the “great” Rupp), and made sure that he didn’t hit the Wild Turkey bottle and try to drive home from the bar. He just simply didn’t have time to recruit players who would be developed into NBA talent.

Or this one:

Leave it to Billy Clyde Gilispie to recruit like a mother. He has already scored top 10 talent of all ages. He will take Kentucky back to single digit losses in just a few short years, as soon as his 8th grade recruits start arriving to Lexington. Too bad he said he was gonna stop recruiting young kids. Rumor is that he had planned to recruit Chicago next week while school is out for the summer. R. Kelly was gonna show him where all the hot spots were to get top talent, before Mr. Kelly got some talent of his own.

I did at least put links in the two passages for the 2 of you who may want to read something related to the post and understand references for statements made. But hell, you guys are too busy fighting amongst each other (starting at comment # 35). How could I have thought that any of you would click the links??? You guys apparently don’t get the irony or the satire. You know, irony and satire are not just the names of the strippers shaking their asses at the local Bigger Jigger in Hopkinsville, KY.

So in closing, yes I will make fun of Kentucky basketball, just like I will make fun of Alabama football, any Memphis sport, and any other topic that I feel like posting about. With no apologies. We don’t need to throw turds against the wall in hopes of getting page hits. If you can’t take the sarcasm, then don’t come back. CNN, Deadspin, Losers With Socks, Jason Whitlock, and others know where we are…

20 Responses to “Good Lord Wildcat Fans, Cool Your Jets”

  1. “Thomas the Terrible could have run point guard and the Celtics were still going to win it all.”

    Nope I would have sabotaged them during series against the Pistons. Go Pistons!!

    “Boston Red Sox (yes you too Thomas)”

    Not yet…only won two titles my lifetime which is an accomplishment that many members of the Sox nation didn’t get to see. :( However if they pull it out this year then that might change by next year. As long as the stinking Yankees don’t win it I’m happy. :)

  2. Jacob said

    HAHAHAHA! I read the original article the other day and didn’t think twice about it. Kentucky fans have gone off their rocker. They were honestly offended, and I find that hilarious. It’s a joke UK. Read the name of the blog and find a sense of humor. Good luck recruiting more 9 year olds. Until then, we will continue taking players from your state that are old enough to drive and turn them into contenders. See ya’ll this winter…

  3. Joel said

    @2 I am glad that SOMEONE found the humor. Indeed, the terrorists have not won…

  4. Chworld22 said

    I am a UK fan and I am willing to defend the team. I thought the article was wrong but you are entitled to your own opinion. I think Memphis basketball until last year was one of the biggest jokes of college basketball all the talent and nothing to show for it. I guess my opinion still really hasn’t changed but they do get a little more respect for making as far as they did. But I also am not an complete fanatic that makes threats on people for their team.

    I have been to every football stadium in the SEC except for UF and SC and if I was as crazy some of the guys that posted on that other thread I would have been beaten up numerous times.

    Basically I just wanted to say that not all UK fans are nuts. Everytime I read one of these things and see the reactions from a lot of our fanbase I start to realize how we have gotten that stigma.

  5. Chworld22 said

    Also, I wanted to add UK has recently built a 2.2 million dollar practice fac. that is very impressive. I have seen it personally and it is a place you have to see to believe. But, I do agree with you on Rupp not being a recruiting tool as a building it is out of date but it is the atmosphere that is within the building that makes it the place it is. If you ever come here to check it out you will feel it for yourself. It is like walking into the worlds largest deer stand on a game day. Even when the team on the field isn’t up to par you have a feeling that something special has happened here before. I have been there and I know that feeling. I also know the feeling of getting yelled at but cars driving by as you walk away from that stadium. LOL

  6. Well, your earlier piece wasn’t that funny even when you got the humor, and it wasn’t one of the world’s best pieces of sarcasm or satire, either. But we all have an off day.

    I did find this follow-up well written, though. Nice work.

    Yes, UK fans are sometimes a little touchy about the team. The sad fact is that our first round picks (never mind the lottery) have been few and far between lately, even though our players have mostly done pretty well in the NBA from the second round and d-league. That’s obviously a sore subject and one we hope to rectify very soon, but you never know how things will work out.

    Keep up the good work. UK fans mostly understand Memphis fans are all nouveau riche in terms of basketball relevance, and we really should try to make allowances for failed attempts at humor. :=)

  7. Joel said

    @4 & @5 I just read these comments after I posted comments on the earlier post. I know that not all UK fans are nuts. Actually, one of my neighbors here in Houston is a UK alum and he thought the post was funny with a little bit of truth mixed in. That was the original point.

    I have been to Rupp Arena back in 1998 to see my alma matter get demolished 97-47. I was surprised the score was that close. I think Tubby was being nice when he pulled the starters with 10 minutes to go in the 1st half…

  8. Joel said

    @6 Wow, 1 whole compliment. I am touched. And nouveau riche huh??? If it wasn’t for ACT prep work back in the day I might have had to google that term…

  9. Chworld22 said

    Well then you should know the atmosphere in Rupp is what makes Rupp. It certainly isn’t the elbow room in the upper deck bleachers or the comfortable folding chairs on courtside.

  10. Joel said

    @9 It was cool. I would say it was better than a certain school in the Carolinas that a #23 went to college but the moderator might kill me…

    Ultimately, for game day experience, being in Giants Stadium for an Army-Navy football game takes the cake…

  11. Chworld22 said

    I have been to the Dean Dome as well. My buddy played for William and Mary so I got to see him get his butt handed to him there. But I got floor seats for free in the Dean Dome so it was amazing.

    The Dean Dome is a great place to watch a game and the student section is nuts.

    Or course I agree with you that Rupp edges it out slightly. When Rupp starts rocking it can compete with any stadium in the nation.

    I would imagine that Army-Navy game would be an insane atmosphere with all those crazy military guys running around on leave.

  12. Joel said

    @11 Dude, the warm and fuzzy feelings have gotta stop. Tell me that Memphis sucks, I will tell you that Kentucky is down, and I can go to bed. I do have to punch the damn clock in the am…

  13. Chworld22 said

    I have a spanish test in the morning so I am with you. So, Memphis Sucks!

  14. Wildcard1 said

    “I chose to use The Pyramid Arena in Memphis because I am a proud native Memphian.”

    “I still support all things Volunteer and all things regarding Memphis Tiger basketball.”

    Joel, Thank you for clearing that up. I couldn’t seem to get that through to Thomas & the Mod the other day that you were a UT fan as well, despite your Pyramid Avatar.

    I do enjoy both of your guys posts most of the time & I got the sarcasm from your article. Like you said, the Title you chose left it open for the feedback you received.

  15. “Joel, Thank you for clearing that up. I couldn’t seem to get that through to Thomas & the Mod the other day that you were a UT fan as well, despite your Pyramid Avatar.”

    Ummm…I didn’t speak to you (that I can remember) but there were two of us running the e-mails (he created a lot) but considering I know the man well I do know he’s a UT fan even though he lives and dies with Memphis basketball & midget wrestling. :)

  16. I stand corrected I just checked the mails and I did speak with you on some occasions.

    I also want to apologize. I got your last e-mail mixed with someone else who was saying some pretty vile and racist remarks against Joel and the people of the Jewish faith. I meant to send the response I sent you to him. I am very very sorry. That guy had me so frazzled with what he was saying I couldn’t see straight. I offer you my most humble apology Wildcard. I hope you can forgive me.

  17. ghettophilosopher said

    ” L.A. Laker fans all are examples of the sports fan “elitist”.”

    Damn straight we’re elitist.

  18. Danometer said

    Kentucky, the new Alabama. It’s a Tide of Wildcat fans, all inbred.

    Adolph Rupp and Paul Bryant used the same tailor for their hooded sheets and drank from the same still.

  19. Wildcard1 said

    No harm, no foul Thomas….

    It makes more sense now…I understand how you reacted the way you did if the other guy was doing that.


  20. Blackhawk said

    Joel I am a UK fan and I got the joke thought it was funny and wasn’t offended….some UK fans are very VERY sensitive as you can now see. Personally Like UT in football when you have a history such as ours there isn’t much reason to get mad since only 1 or 2 teams out there can come close to matching our accomplishments.

    Yet some fans think that they have to educate folks about us….heck there are a numbers of schools you could have used you know it I know it but fans of ours have this notion that we have always had tons of lottery picks and number people taken and the beauty of UK basketball is that most of our history has come from in state guys with a handful of really good players.

    There is so much pride because of the local guys. Most of them still live in KY and people see them all the time and thus their allegiance grows even more.

    But hey the article was funny and not meant to be taken that seriously I got it and even tried to throw a little humor back your way with post #92…sorry if I failed.

    Anyway like the blog guys.

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