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Archive for July 21st, 2008

Big Orange Roundtable Vol. III

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on July 21, 2008

It’s that time of the week again, time for the Big Orange Roundtable to meet. This week Joel at Rocky Top Talk is the host site. This time the questions are fun and difficult. I would have had my answers posted sooner but I was to busy throwing full jars of baby food at homeless people who were wearing Alabama t-shirts and time just kinda got away from me. but I did nail Latrell Sprewell in the head.

1. For some inexplicable reason, Phillip Fulmer invites Urban Meyer, Mark Richt, Steve Spurrier, Nick Saban, Les Miles, and Tommy Tuberville over to his palatial estate for a dinner party. At 2:00 a.m. the next morning, The Papa discovers that Smokey IX has been murdered. Who did it, with what, and where? Think Clue. You know, Mr. Mustard in the parlor with the candlestick?

This one is obvious. It was Mark Richt. You see the great Battle Captain as a title, so does Meyer and Miles. Even Tuberville is the people’s champion of 2004. But Richt has nothing…except being leader of the “Third Richt.”

He saw innocent Smokey, curled up and sleeping in the media room with his “98 National Champs” collar on and lost it. He gave Smokey poisoned dog food from China, but that was only small measure of cruelty Richt dished out. During Smokey’s final moments on earth, he was forced to endure videos of Herschel Walker performing crunches over and over again. (picture credit goes to LWS)

2. Who between Eric Berry for the defense and Gerald Jones for the Clawfense will have the biggest impact for the Vols in 2008?

Eric Berry. You think last year was something? This year he is seasoned and has even gained weight while gaining speed. Quarterbacks will tremble at the sight of him on the field.

3. You devise a way to harness the Lost island’s temporal displacement properties. The island will allow you to change one thing, but one thing only, in the history of the Tennessee Volunteer football program. What do you change? By the way, Ben warns that if you try to say “2005″ or any other entire season, the mysterious clicking black smoke will sound its wailing siren, shoot from the earth, grab you by the ankles, and pound you to a pulp against a palm tree. So change only one thing. Unless, of course, you like that sort of thing.

Well I do like that sort of thing but I will not change a complete season. However I will change the 2002 Alabama game. You know the where Brodie Croyle was being tackled and was down (which instant replay shows) but somehow wasn’t called down. That was the turning point of the game.

That game snapped a seven game win streak against the Tide, plus with wins in 03 & 04 it would have been an even 10 in a row.

I hate Lost by the way.

4. What about the future? What is your worst fear for this upcoming season, the turn of events that would send you into a blind rage?

The appearance of lack of trying. Look I don’t mind losing, I don’t like it, but I don’t mind it, as long as they tried. There were several instances in which the beloved Vols didn’t appear to even try. If I see that junk this year, my blood will boil.

Look for the other Roundtable members and their answers here:

Posted in Go Vols, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Tennessee Volunteers, The Big Orange Roundtable | Leave a Comment »

Cat Fight in Pit Row…Sweet!

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on July 21, 2008

Did you know there’s another female Indy Car Driver? I didn’t. Her name is Milka Duno who I now dub as the Venezuelan Vixen.

Apparently Indy car driver and formally the hottest chick in racing, Danica Patrick, didn’t like the Venezuelan Vixen’s driving at the Mid-Ohio Sports Car Course, which led to an heated cat fight in pit row.

On a video shot by a friend of Duno’s she told Patrick on several occasions to “go away.” When Patrick didn’t leave immediately, Duno threw a towel in Patrick’s direction. (Oh no she didn’t!) That prompted Patrick to “talk dirty” in the Vixen’s direction before the minute-long incident ended.

“She came to my team and our pit box in a very bad way with bad words,” Duno said. “If you come in a nice way, perfect, we can talk. If you come in a bad way, you are going to find my bad side.

“I don’t like drama, and I told her ‘go away, you are not welcome.’.”

Of course being the bitch she is, Patrick doesn’t regret the incident:

“Unfortunately, things involving me tend to evolve. I’m on the hot seat when I do something and when others do something (connected to me). It’s kind of the line that I walk because I’m popular.”

The Venezuelan Vixen issued a clear warning to Patrick:

“I don’t like the show she likes in every race weekend,” Duno said. “She can push the guys because they cannot do anything to her, but she cannot push me. We meet on equal condition (as women), and I know what kind of character I have.

“I know if somebody pushes me and finds my bad side they are going to get a problem.”

I think I’m in love…

Posted in Cat Fight, Danica Patrick, Indy Car, Milka Duno | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

Hey Ohio State Fans…some Quarterback Named Carson Palmer can’t stand you

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on July 21, 2008

Carson Palmer, the former Heisman winning QB for SoCal and current Cincinnati Bengals QB, has a clear message for Ohio State fans. He can’t stand them at least that’s what he said Los Angeles radio show.

“I cannot stand the Buckeyes. It’s amazing to hear what those guys think about that university and what they think about that football program and Tressel and all the crap I gotta put up with being back there.

I just can’t wait for two years from now when SC comes to the ‘Shoe and hopefully we’ll have a home game that weekend and I can go up there and watch us pound on them in their own turf

I’m really getting sick of it and I just can’t wait for this game to get here so they can come out to the Coliseum and experience LA and get an old-fashioned Pac-10 butt-whoopin’ and go back to the Big Ten.”

Yes, Carson is certainly making new fans everyday. If this keeps up I’m sure the rumor mill will start turning to a certain quarterback named Brett F**re (I refuse to type his name) coming to the Bengals.

Then again I did say that tOSU fans knew they weren’t liked so maybe this isn’t a shock to them.

Posted in Carson Palmer, Cincinnati Bengals, Pac 10 football, SoCal, USC, University of Southern Cal, big ten football, ohio state buckeyes, tOSU | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments »