Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Archive for August 1st, 2008

Ken Lucas: You just got knocked the f*ck out by Steve Smith

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on August 1, 2008

Dude you got punked!

Dude you got punked!

Steve “Hands of Stone” Smith punched beat the hell out of cornerback Ken Lucas during a sideline beat down during Friday morning’s practice, leaving Lucas’ left eye bloodied and swollen and Smith looking like he’s ready to challenge Steven Seagal as the worlds toughest douche bag.

Smith was sent home to start training for a warm-up bout with Kimbo Slice, according to Coach John Fox. Lucas also returned to Charlotte to undergo a medical examination cause he was fucked up royally.

The Panthers are debating on whether or not to suspend Smith, who was involved in a similar fight with a teammate in 2002 after another jackass, smarted off to him.

“We’re still going through everything right now,” Panthers general manager Marty Hurney said. “We are working through it internally and will let you know when we have an update.”

Just goes to show you that Steve Smith is one tough little guy.

According to witnesses, the two players were on the sidelines discussing a play that happened previously at camp. The talks got heated and Smith stood up and sucker punched Lucas.

The beat down soon followed and Coach John Fox charged in to break it up. Linebacker Jon Beason had to pull Smith away from Lucas. It took several people to restrain the men and restore order.

Lucas was immediately taken to a tent next to the practice field and babied because he’s bitch treated by trainer Ryan Vermillion. His face was bloodied and he appeared to have a large gash under his left eye. He held an icepack on his face for several minutes hoping to freeze the tears that would soon be following.

Shortly after the fight, Smith – with Muhsin Muhammad and an assistant coach by his side – came over to the tent and attempted to reconcile with Lucas. The two men briefly exchanged a man-hug.

Smith, obviously distraught by the fact his teammate is such a wuss, walked over and talked to friend John Kasay.

“Steve was probably a little remorseful for what happened and was trying to apologize,” Muhammad said.

Smith, with a towel over his head and a gleam in his eye, was then escorted from the practice field by Hurney. Some fans, not knowing what happened, screamed for Smith to sign autographs but he didn’t raise his head as he walked on by.

Lucas, meanwhile, left the field on a cart like a drama queen bitch.

The incident should serve as a reminder of Smith’s overblown much-publicized film room beat down on former teammate Anthony Bright in 2002. Smith took exception to something Bright said in the film room and began taking care of business, damaging Bright’s face. Bright later pressed charges against Smith but a civil suit was settled out of court. Bright is another bitch.

“I think any time something like that happens you are disappointed,” Fox said. “it’s part of football and you deal with it.”

Fox would not say what caused the incident. He knows what might happen to him if he speaks out.

“I’m not going to deal with this in the media,” he said.

Muhammad said he’s concerned about Smith being suspended for a game or possibly longer, he has some muscle work for him lined up.

“Obviously, everybody is going to be waiting to see what are the repercussions for this event,” said Muhammad. “I’m just praying that we rally together as a team because, obviously, there’s going to be some adversity here.

“The focus is not where it needs to be right now, which is training to play this 2008 season. I’m hoping we all come together as a team, as a family, and are able to put this behind us and come together and focus on the season, focus on winning games, and keep the big picture in mind because we’re all here to try to win a Super Bowl.”

Quarterback Jake Delhomme said he didn’t know what prompted the fight. After all he’s not rat.

“When that happens on the field, usually guys have helmets on, but this happened on the sidelines, so it probably wasn’t a good idea,” Delhomme said.

“I don’t anticipate this having any lingering effect on this team,” Delhomme said. “We were talked to and things were squashed. That’s it. That’s the way it is. It happened. There will be no retaliation by anybody on anything. When you look at the schedule, we don’t play the Panthers this year. So we need to be smart when we’re out there.”

There has been some bad blood between Smith and Lucas in the past, although they’ve never come to blows.

A few years ago at training camp, not long after Lucas signed a six-year, $36 million, Smith was heard talking trash to Lucas on the field. After he beat Lucas for a touchdown, Smith turned and said, “I’m earning my money; you better start earning yours.”

A few minutes later, Smith beat Lucas for another score and said, “That’s two, bitch.”

When asked if he’s worried about losing Smith to a suspension, Delhomme said, “We don’t know what is going to happen, but this team can’t stop. This team has to keep going on. There was not another skirmish. Both sides collected themselves and finished off practice in a positive way.”

They are going to have to trade Steve Smith, Jerry Jones pick up the phone!!

And they say you don’t tug on Superman’s cape
You don’t spit into the wind
You don’t pull the mask off an ‘ole Lone Ranger
And you don’t fuck around with Steve Smith

Posted in Carolina Panthers, Ken Lucas, NFL Football, Rocky, Steve Smith | Tagged: , , , , | 3 Comments »

Weekend Random Musings

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on August 1, 2008

I’m tired, it’s hot and this has been a long week and I’m dying for football to start. Let’s get musing.

First up Gate 21 has this weeks Big Orange Roundtable Roundup posted

and don’t forget to check out of the other member’s answers to this weeks questions

Jai Eugene of LWS has posted the Tennessee Football Bible…and the congregation said Go Vols!

Fulmer’s Belly takes a look at Alabama

The 3rd Saturday in Blogtober offers up the surprise of the season

Moondog offers the second part of a 4 part series on College Football’s Best Stadiums

Black Shoe Diaries makes a great point about Penn State and their recent “troubles”

I added yet another Tennessee Blog “Tales from the Darkside

Chicken Curse Dot Com details fans reaction of Garcia’s return to the Gamecocks

Another reason the Olympics will suck: They’re serving Penises as a dish

In an survey done by Golf Digest:

Which word best describes Sergio Garcia during the Ryder Cup?

a) Insufferable: 40%
b) Unbeatable: 25%
c) Both of the above: 35%

“He’s like a gnat that just swarms around your head. Irritating.” . . . “The other guys, from what I’ve heard, don’t really like Sergio that much — but they love him during the Ryder Cup.” . . . “He acts like a 6-year-old.”

For a better understanding read the story.

If Rush Limbaugh does buy the Rams will he become the most annoying NFL owner?

Josh Howard an admitted pot smoker apparently has a need for speed. Hence that’s why he was arrested for drag racing.

That’s all I have so remember you’ll never be like me

Props to Tim J whom I work for sending me this photo

Posted in Tennessee Volunteers, The Big Orange Roundtable, WTF | 3 Comments »

Fo Shizzle Snoop Dogg & Les Miles are new BFFs

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on August 1, 2008

Apparently Snoop Dogg is no longer a SoCal fan. Snoop Dogg made a cameo appearance during Miles’ speech to the weekly meeting of local business people. They were brought together by their common belief that before you dig you out a bitch, you have to find a contraceptive.

I wish I was an LSU recruit. I could picture my parents sitting on the couch as Coach Miles & ‘Recruiter Snoop” come in with 3 bitches, a water bong, and more narcotics than a Colombian cargo plane

“I just wanted to give my love and support to coach Miles,” Snoop Dogg said as he briefly stepped behind the podium. “I met him last night.

“So you’ve got my love and support, from S.C. I’m here to support him.”

“Ben Miles is all over Snoop’s stuff. I found every guy around him is a former coach or player, and he runs a league of youth football and provides opportunities for young people. I defend his music, and am much more a fan of the person.” Miles said.

Snoop must be so relieved to have Les Miles coming to the defense of his music. Rumor has it that Saban’s going to the mattresses. He’s calling in Fiddy.

Les Miles reportedly ended the press conference proclaiming “We don’t you Hos, I’m out tha doe”

Ben Miles may be all over Snoop's stuff, but Les Miles is apparently terrified of him.

Posted in LSU Tigers, Les Miles, SEC, SEC Coaches, Satan, Snoop Dogg | Tagged: , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Let’s Rap about shooting people that will lead us to the Heisman

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on August 1, 2008

Josh Jarboe who was arrested earlier this year on a weapons charge has made this lovely video during which he raps about guns and shooting people. Heisman voters take notice now!

Jarboe signed with the Sooners in February. In March, he was arrested after an assistant principal at Cedar Grove High School in Ellenwood, Ga., told a school police officer he saw Jarboe grab a gun from a car.

Jarboe was expelled from school, but completed his high school degree online. Insert F$U scandal joke here.

After Jarboe’s guilty plea, Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops issued a statement saying that the Sooners “look forward to a long and successful career for him both academically and on the football field.

“He became involved in a situation at his school during his senior year that certainly has caused us concern. At the same time, we have personal knowledge of Josh through our recruiting contact with him and from personal references from his school and individuals of authority in his life. We have already stressed to him that his citizenship is of the utmost importance. He understands that anything less than exemplary behavior will not be tolerated.”

Well apparently his response is below.

Posted in Big Twelve Football, Bob Stoops, Oklahoma sooners | Tagged: , , | Leave a Comment »