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Archive for September, 2008

The living corpse Al Davis has officially begun the process of replacing Kiffin

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 30, 2008

The rumors have been out there for weeks. The living corpse Al Davis is going to fire Kiffin to make sure the Raiders get that #1 draft pick again. The Raiders are like the North Korea of the NFL.  Owner Al Davis wants a puppet for a head coach and Kiffin isn’t it. There’s even a website devoted to tracking the firing of Kiffin.

Well the process of replacing Kiffin has officially begun. Al Davis scheduled one-hour meetings Monday evening with three members of the coaching staff — offensive coordinator Greg Knapp, offensive line coach Tom Cable and longtime NFL offensive coordinator and current Raiders consultant Paul Hackett.

Kiffin took the high road and declined to comment Monday evening when contacted. During his Monday news conference, he told the local press he was no longer going to discuss any of his conversations or meetings with Davis. It is believed Davis has not talked to him about a possible change.

“I just feel we’re going to open up too many things, and those are conversations that I do or do not have with him that should stay between him and I,” Kiffin said in his news conference.

“At times we’re playing as well as anybody in the league. I know that sounds strange for you guys to hear, but look at the numbers,” Kiffin said in his news conference. “Look at the way we’re playing in the first three quarters of the last three weeks in a row; we’re playing good enough to be on a three-game winning streak. All that being said, we’re 1-3.”

Kiffin seems to have the Raiders headed in the right direction. Too bad the owner is way out of touch with reality.

Davis has told Bay Area reporters he may speak to them at some point this week. Once he settles on a possible replacement, Davis could then inform Kiffin and make a change during the bye week.

This Raider team is losing BECAUSE of all the distractions that DAVIS IS CAUSING!!!! That has an effect on how a team practices during the week. I believe, as many people do, that this team could have had a 3-1 start and be tied with Denver.

Al Davis’ ego won’t allow him to let Kiffin coach without interference. He got rid of two good coaches, Gruden and Shanahan who have each won Super Bowls elsewhere, (and in Gruden’s case, at the expense of the Raiders!). Davis wants a guy he can manipulate, and Kiffin’s “disobedience” in disagreeing with Davis over personnel and coaches is looked upon as an act of defiance.

Once a respected football executive and shrewd football mind, Davis is now just a sad old man who can’t see he’s suffocating his own franchise.

UPDATE!!!

ESPN is reporting that the living corpse has canned Kiffin “without pay via the telephone”, I’m sure Kiffin’s attorneys will have something to say about that.

Stay classy Al!!!

Posted in Al Davis, Kiffin, NFL Draft, NFL Football, Oakland Raiders, moron | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Vicious hit of the week & I mean vicious

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 30, 2008

Vicious:

  • (a.) Bitter; spiteful; malignant.
  • (a.) Characterized by vice or defects; defective; faulty; imperfect.
  • (a.) Not well tamed or broken; given to bad tricks; unruly; refractory; as, a vicious horse.
  • (a.) Addicted to vice; corrupt in principles or conduct; depraved; wicked; as, vicious children; vicious examples; vicious conduct.

Eric Smith seemly demolished Anquan Boldin in Sunday’s Cardinals/Jets game to the point that Boldin had to be taken off the field on a stretcher. It was clearly a cheap & vicious helmet to helmet hit, watch the video below and you will see the hit if you wait for the replay to slow down.

The NFL has now taken swift, and somewhat appropriate, action against Smith, by suspending him for one game and fining him $50,000.

Specifically, on a pass play on Sunday, Smith engaged in helmet-to-helmet contact with Arizona Cardinals wide receiver Anquan Boldin, who was in a defenseless position at the time contact was made.

The suspension will sideline Smith for the Jets’ game against the Cincinnati Bengals on Sunday, Oct. 12 following the Jets bye on Oct. 5. The $50,000 fine includes the game check Smith will forfeit for the week of his suspension.

While at the least it’s a punishment but is it enough? I wouldn’t mind seeing Roger “The Sheriff” Goodell suspend the violators of the helmet to helmet rule, for the length of the injury sustained by the victim and then a minimum of 3 games beyond that. Quite frankly I also wouldn’t mind see the fines raise to a minimum of $200,000 either. Let’s face it for some players a $50,000 fine simply means they will have to shorten a vacation by two days during the off season. These are just my opinions if you have any others please voice them.

Posted in Arizona Cardinals, Fines, NFL, NFL Football, New York Jets, Roger Goodell | Tagged: , , , , , | 2 Comments »

It Could Be Worse…At Least We Aren’t…

Posted by Joel on September 30, 2008

Obviously, this year’s edition of Volunteer has officially gone down the crapper. Visiting any number of Volunteer blogs will do nothing more than depress you. Well I am here to cheer up fans of Rocky Top. Even though the days of acutally competing with Top 10 teams and being considered the upper crust of the SEC are gone, and Fulmer’s coaching career have gone down quicker than a 50 cent stripper on 2 for 1 night, things could be worse. The hard working folks at Losers With Socks asked a very intriguing question, “What is worse than the Tennessee Offense?”  Well that got me to thinking, what if Tennessee football was meant to suck??? Since I am a glass is half full type of person, and we here at YMSWWC consider ourselves “Solutions Oriented”, I have decided to cheer up the fans by saying that it could be worse…at least we aren’t…

I cannot tell if these guys are entering the practice field stadium for the next loss or leaving because they wanna hit the internet and read about the next 8 year old that Billy Clyde just signed. See, the school thinks football is that sport that gets in the way of basketball. So let us examine some of the “fine points” of Kentucky football, and Wildcat fans, you should be ashamed.

  • They can’t get Ashley Judd to show up there. Who could blame her.
  • When Bear Bryant coached there, he was smoking Lucky Strikes & had no houndstooth.
  • You had to get Jeff Sagarin & his iMac to declare you National Champions in 1950 (before integration).
  • Your cheerleading squad has won more titles than you, a fact your school proudly declares on your website.
  • You keep asking at games “When are they gonna put up basketball goals”
  • You have only gone to 12 bowl games in history.
  • Hal Mumme brought offense and probation with him.
  • Can’t beat Tennessee.
  • George Blanda is the last All-Pro your school has produced.
  • Tim Couch.

So you see, it could be worse Vols. Oh, and don’t worry Kentucky. Midnight Madness is on October 10th, Patrick Patterson is returning, and Ashton “I’m Rick James Bitch” Cobb is no longer on the team. Good times by all…

Oh and I know Kentucky is 4-0 so far, but beating such powerhouses like Middle Tennessee St., Western Kentucky, and Louisville only makes you champions of I-65…

Posted in College Football, Crime & Punishment, Kentucky Wildcats, NCAA, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee Volunteers, Tim Couch | Tagged: , , , , , | 5 Comments »

Kentucky Football Player Charged with Stalking & Wearing a Seriously ugly shirt

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 29, 2008

Let's put a smile on that face Ashton

Kentucky strong safety Ashton Cobb didn’t play in last Saturday’s game against Western Kentucky. In fact he wasn’t even in the stadium He wasn’t injured or suspended for academic reasons and small violations against team rules such as missing curfew.

Cobb wasn’t present because he broke serious team rule not to mention a serious law. He was arrested last Friday for stalking after his ex-girlfriend said he sent her several threatening text and voicemail messages, according to court records.

He is charged with second-degree stalking, third-degree terroristic threatening, and harassing communications.

Cobb’s ex-girlfriend said he called her about 19 times and sent about 15 text messages on Thursday, court records say. In one voicemail message he used profane language, saying he would kill and rape her.

He then sent a text message that read, “Why so serious?” referencing the Joker from the newest Batman movie, court records say.

Ashton is just upset because he has a 13-year-old girl name. However if these charges prove to be true let’s all hope he is put away for a good long time.

Some men aren’t looking for anything logical. They can’t be bought, bullied, or reasoned with. Some men…just want awesome collared shirts. However that one is rather ugly. But the Rick James hair worries me more than the shirt.

Posted in Crime & Punishment, Dark Knight, Kentucky Wildcats, SEC Football, Stalking, The Joker, Western Kentucky | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

The Tennessee/Auburn grade book

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 29, 2008

Riddle me this dear readers:

What is the one thing that is older than God?

The answer is simple really, it’s time. Jim Croce wanted to bottle it, Pink Floyd sang about it on their Dark Side of the Moon album and Styx claimed to have to much of it on their hands.

Time is one thing we waste while at the same moment wishing we had more. At 1-3 time is seemly running out on the Fulmer era and time is quickly closing in on the realization that Crompton simply is not the best option at QB for this team.

Fulmer announced yesterday that Crompton and Stephens will split practice time at the QB position. That is an excellent sign that a change at the QB position is coming.

“I’d much rather the guy we anticipated being the starter play well and execute like we want,” Fulmer said during his weekly teleconference Sunday. “But that’s not happening for us on a consistent basis right now. I think we have to take a look at our options.”

Of course the Mountain (False) Messiah doesn’t see things that clearly. If his talent and decision making were as great as his arrogance, he would own every Tennessee passing record there is today.

“It brings out the best in me and I have every confidence in the world in myself that I’m going to be fine and I’m still going to be the guy,” Crompton said Sunday night. “That’s just how I go look at it.”

In my opinion Crompton is the reason Tennessee lost this game. If it wasn’t for the fumble that resulted in an Auburn touchdown, Tennessee would have won the game.

Crompton must have some dirt or something against Fulmer because Fulmer states the fumble was Foster’s fault. I’ve watched that play over and over in slow motion and zoom and I just don’t see it the way he does.

Fumble Explained: The fumbled handoff between Crompton and tailback Arian Foster that resulted in an Auburn touchdown was a result of Foster holding his right elbow too low on the exchange, Fulmer said.

“It hit Arian’s elbow,” Fulmer said. “He didn’t quite have his elbow up as high as he should have.”

Either way it’s time for some significant changes either with the coaching and play calling or at the QB position.

Ladies and Gentlemen: let’s open this week’s grade book.

Quarterbacks F

Even Peyton Manning’s presence couldn’t help the Mountain Messiah. Jonathan Crompton’s fumble was the reason this game was a loss for Tennessee. He was 8-of-23 for 67 yards. Not good. In fact that’s downright embarrassing. Crompton looks like he has ADD. He clearly isn’t focused at times and appears confused. While the G-Gun option was successful at times it obviously wasn’t enough to secure the points needed to win. Crompton and UT’s receivers clearly weren’t on the same page on several plays.

Running Backs C-

Even though Fulmer has pinned the fumble on Arian Foster, saying he had his arm too low on the exchange, I whole hardly disagree with that assessment. Crompton did not look the ball in. It’s that simple. Hardesty looked great and Fosters had some decent runs.

Receivers D

Lucas Taylor dropped a perfect pass out of the G-Gun.. The Vols didn’t look dynamic but they proved the ability to get open at times against a good Auburn secondary. However I’ll admit there were some plays that they could have done more to help a struggling QB out.

Offensive line D-

UT’s top two rushers, Foster and Hardesty, averaged less than four yards a carry. The Vols allowed six tackles for a loss, including two sacks.

Secondary A+

UT’s vaunted secondary allowed one Auburn touchdown, and played to win in the second half. Dennis Rogan’s interception and exceptional run back set up Tennessee’s only touchdown and was a big momentum changer.

Linebackers A-

Nevin McKenzie had two pass breakups, including a big-time play the ended an Auburn drive in the fourth quarter. Ellix Wilson had 10 tackles, including one for a loss. Rico McCoy had six tackles.

Defensive Line A+

The D-Line showed serious ability defending two quarterbacks with far different styles. Ben Martin registered the first sack of the season by a UT defensive end. Fellow end Chris Walker had another. Tackle Dan Williams had eight tackles, two for a loss. Robert Ayers also recorded a tackle behind the line of scrimmage.

Special Teams B+

Chad Cunningham’s leg finally woke up & dropped three punts inside the 5 and kicking two touchbacks. Daniel Lincoln made both his field-goal tries, his first attempts since UT’s opener. Gerald Jones provided a spark on punt returns, including a 40-yarder that flipped the field.

Coaching D/C

Tennessee couldn’t get 11 men on the field in the first quarter when linebacker Adam Myers-White had to sprint onto the field as Auburn snapped the ball. That play defines the first month of the season. The offensive play calling is atrocious. When is the last time Tennessee has called for a screen play?

The “C” is for the great job Chavis has done with the defense this season. Tennessee is ranked 4th nationally in interceptions. The secondary is plain nasty and the linebackers are great. I’m confused as to why everyone wants Chavis gone.

Overall D-

Perhaps UT has enough talent to compete for a championship. However unless fundamentals improve dramatically this team will go down in the books as one of the worst Tennessee teams in the storied history that is Tennessee Football. The Vols better get better play from their quarterback, whoever he might be.

Posted in Auburn, Go Vols, Mountain Messiah, Peyton Manning, Rocky Top, SEC Football, Tennessee Volunteers, cromptonites, fire philip fulmer, fulmer sucks, moral victories | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

College Football Week 5 is in the books & here’s what I learned

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 28, 2008

Ah how I love upsets and there were plenty for this week.

Well the Fulmer death clock continues to tick…as always be expecting a full game grade tomorrow after I watch a tape of the game today.

Don’t look now but UCONN is 5-0, you should expect them to be ranked.

Michigan State is a contender for now…but for some reason they always implode mid season.

Speaking of imploding, Syracuse actually led Pittsburgh but ultimately lost. There’s internet chatter about Lloyd Carr becoming the next Orangemen coach.

Clemson…WTF? Oh, wait my mistake…the annual Tommy Bowden fail is occurring.

Northwestern is 5-0 and Iowa still sucks.

The miracle that occurred in the Miami-North Carolina game was amazing to watch.

Gee. Urban…is fourth down and one yard to go. You trail by one with time quickly ticking away. Why didn’t you try the 49 yard field goal? Was it arrogance? At least update the play book and run something other than a Tebow keeper. Great win for Ole Miss and the Rev. Nutt.

Fresno state continues to win and I love it.

I’m getting sick and damn tired of seeing that stupid Olive Garden commercial that they were over playing last year.

I hate F$U when I pick them to win, they let down. Win I pick to lose they win. Bastards!

Look out Notre Dame is 3-1 let’s place them in the Top 5 stat!

Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez gets a huge…huge win against a top 10 Wisconsin team.

I hope you enjoyed your visit to the top 25 East Carolina because it is officially over.

Wow…Navy beats Wake Forest…just how bad does the ACC suck?

Oklahoma should have scored more points than they did.

South Carolina struggled against a UAB team that Tennessee blew out…interesting.

Wow Miss. State does have an offense after all, to bad they lost though.

Look for South Florida to enter the top 10 this week.

Welcome back Virginia Tech. however the first year Nebraska coach actually helped your cause by getting a 15 yard penalty for “debating” a call with the ref.

I hope Ty Willingham has called North American Moving by now.

What can I say about Alabama…other than they cheat, but they laid it on Georgia. Anyone else notice that Nick Saban is sporting the Behr Bryant alcoholism red nose?

Don’t look now but Duke is 3-1 and the Virginia coach is probably and should be suicidal at this point.

Joe Pa rules bitches but give the fighting Zookers credit for keeping it respectable.

Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, Bama Cheats, Big East, Big Twelve Football, Clemson Tigers, Crimson Tide, David Cutcliffe, Duke Blue Devils, East Carolina Pirates, Florida Gators, Florida State Seminoles, Georgia Bulldogs, Herban Meyer, Houston Nutt, Illinois Fighting Illini, Internet Rumors, Joe Pa, Joe Paterno, LSU Tigers, Lloyd Carr, Miami hurricanes, Michigan State Spartons, Michigan Wolverines, Nebraska Cornhuskers, Nick Saban, North Carolina Tarheels, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, Oklahoma sooners, Pac 10 football, Penn State Nittany Lions, Roll Tide, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Skip Holtz, South Florida Bulls, Tennessee Volunteers, UCLA, Uga, Urban Meyer, Virginia Tech, WTF, Wisconsin Badgers, Zooker, alcoholics, big ten football, fire philip fulmer, jorts, notre dame sucks, suicide, upsets | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Random Musings for Friday…A Tragic Thing has Occured

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 26, 2008

I’m presently writing this from a double super secret location. Tragically my motherboard died last night so this is not typed from comfort of my lair. I’ll buy a new one today and be up and running by tonight. In the mean time think about this:

The USC Trojans were beaten by the Beavers (Get your minds out of the gutter) to become the newest most talented college football failures.

LawVol has written on open letter to the Vol nation.

Who would you choose as the next University of Tennessee football coach?

There are plenty of rumors that swirling around Phil Fulmer at the moment.

You should see what the soccer moms are carrying in Lebanon, Pa.

And now here is the newest “Damn! what a catch!” It should win an Espy.

Posted in Pac 10 football, Phillip Fulmer, Rocky Top, SoCal, Tennessee Volunteers, USC, University of Southern Cal, fire philip fulmer, fulmer sucks | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

The fashion police just keep arresting Idaho football

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 25, 2008

Pooping in the "I" formation

The Idaho Vandals football team opened this season with a 70-0 loss to the Arizona Wildcats. It was the first and last time the team wore their new uniforms that featured pants with the letter “I” sewn right on the pooper-hole area.

Rob Spears, the school’s athletic director, says nobody realized just how the logo placed in the center of the players’ behinds would look before they tried their pants on.

Of course the some fashion police fans complained and the sewn-in University of Idaho logo has since been hastily removed by equipment managers.

“I was disappointed with the look and the appearance,” Spears says. “It’s changed.”

Now the Idaho fashion police are targeting the cheerleaders. They have complained that the outfits were slutty!

“A number of fans were concerned that the uniforms were inappropriate,” said Bruce Pitman, U of I Dean of Students. “To be fair, there were a number of fans who liked them.”

My best guess is more people like the new uniforms than those that opposed them after all considering the team’s record the cheerleader uniforms were very much a bright spot.

The $4200 uniforms were purchased from the squad’s own account, part of which is funded from student fees. The squad has ordered new $2200 uniforms with private money.

Posted in College Football, Fashion Police, Idaho Vandals | Tagged: , , | Leave a Comment »

Kige the Love Guru is here

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 25, 2008

You know being a single male is hard these days. Sure I’ve thought about trying dating websites, maybe going to a bar or just paying the local hookers extra to cuddle. However I just don’t feel any of those things will work for me. So instead I’m going to take love advice from a man who makes videos for YouTube and who also has such exquisite taste in paneling.

I was hoping that Kige would answer that the best place to meet women is Wal-Mart. If you listen very closely at the 1:09 mark, you can hear Kige getting a boner. Next week: how to ask out your first cousin. I really, really hope that becomes a regular feature.

I would have paid $100 if he had ended that with, “wine & dine her, slip her a roofie and cornhole her right over there on the couch. This is Kige Ramsey, for YouTube Sports.”

Posted in Kige Ramsey, Sex, Wal-Mart, YouTube | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Fulmer admits it was a gradual decline of smartness

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 24, 2008

Fulmer did something that I and majority of the Tennessee fans can not do at this very moment and that actually express confidence in the team. He believes the team will end the foul play that as caused the 1-2 start (Again!) of this season. I believe it to, I believe my beloved Vols will go 1-3.

Actually working like heck to show some resemblance of emotion during his weekly excuse to the press conference, Fulmer promises like heck that the team will work & prepare like heck to be ass raped by play Auburn this coming weekend.

“I think this football team is a team that will fight,” Fulmer said. “Certainly we haven’t had an effort problem. We haven’t had an attitude problem. Contrary to what some people might have said on television, we haven’t had a leadership problem at all. We have a consistency of execution problem on offense from time to time. We’ve been here before and we know how to respond to that and coach.”

Yes you were here in 2005…the 5-6 year. To be honest stating the team has a problem executing of the offense time to time is the understatement of the year. It’s more like this offense is anemic all the time.

“We’ve won 148 football games in my time here at Tennessee and lost a little bit less than that – a lot less than that, actually – and we didn’t all of a sudden get stupid as coaches. We know what we’re doing, and we’re going to go to the practice field and correct and work and put our football team on the field with the best advantage that we can possibly have.”

See there? He admitted it! Fulmer didn’t start out as a stupid coach it was a gradual process, like water erosion, tooth decay & the douche bagginess of Urban Meyer. Either way they might not be stupid all the time. It just seems like they are always slightly stupid at game time.

My question is if the team is working that hard for the sole purpose of gaining the best advantage on the field, how sorry would the team be without the “extra effort”?

Fulmer was asked twice by callers on his Monday night radio show if he thought about retiring and be like OJ Simpson and simply play golf fulltime, minus the getting away with murder and Las Vegas heist of course. That’s when Fulmer really got irritated.

“Because somebody boos in the stands doesn’t mean you don’t have the support. That just means they’re passionate about what they do. They just want to win,” Fulmer said, adding that he had received calls of support from friends and family. “Ninety-five percent of them probably never played football before, or maybe not played a sport. I don’t know. I can’t tell you all that. I would have booed a couple things I saw out there if I’d have been in the stands. That goes with the territory when your fans and your people are passionate about what they want to see on the field. I wouldn’t have it any other way from that standpoint. Now, do I like to be booed? No. Do I want to be booed again? No. But if I stay in this profession, you don’t think I’m going to have an opportunity to get booed? That just goes with the territory.”

Josh “He brings hell with him” Briscoe seconded that sentiment.

“It makes us mad as a team,” he said. “The ones who are saying that, most of them probably didn’t play football. They all don’t or have never coached football. They’re not putting in the 18 hours a day that coach Fulmer’s putting in. They’re not out there on the practice field and out there going through the training and conditioning that we’re going through. It’s very unfair to coach Fulmer because he’s dedicated his life to this, and so has all our coaching staff and this team.

“I’m not a guy that usually comes up and is very vocal about things, but that’s one of the things that hurt me a lot,” Briscoe continued. “Everybody seems to know how to coach. Everybody seems to know how to fix situations. But the real fact is, if everybody had all the answers this world would be a completely different place. Everybody doesn’t have the answers. Everybody’s not given the ability to coach football, to play college football, to be president of the United States or whatever it is. That really hurts because we dedicate our lives to this.”

Now the booing of the team by fellow Tennessee fans does sicken me but the “wah wah wah your boos hurt my little feelings” sicken me just as much. That being said what the young and fiery Briscoe needs to understand is that even the boo-birds aren’t putting in 18 hours a day as a coach for the team, some are putting 18 hours day to be able to afford things like tickets to the game, team paraphernalia, membership dues and maybe God willing other things like food. Those people aren’t getting paid around 2 million a year either. However those people also pay Fulmer’s salary. The donations pay for the facilities and oh yeah the very scholarship you’re on Mr. Biscoe.

So the bottom line is this; Play better and win and guess what the boos will suddenly stop and God willing so will your girlish crying.

Posted in Phillip Fulmer, SEC Coaches, Tennessee Volunteers, boo birds, fire philip fulmer, fulmer sucks | Tagged: , , , , , | 8 Comments »