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Archive for October 14th, 2008

Has this ever happened to you when you were urinating outside the karaoke club?

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 14, 2008

This story has all the elements that make Hemingway proud: ping pong, karaoke, urination, violence and of course a man named Wang.

Wang Hao is the marquee player in China’s premier table tennis league which is a fancy way of saying ping pong and who also won a team gold at the Beijing Games. He is the face of ping pong damn it!

For the record you should see the movie Ball of Fury it is hilarious.

It seems Wang was outside a karaoke club minding his own business while draining his dragon, when a security guard attempted to stop him midstream. Now that’s worth about 1000 douche bag points right there people.

Kerry Wood salutes you Wang.

Ozzy Osborne, however, is less than impressed…

During this altercation Wang uttered perhaps the greatest ping pong quote ever:

“I am the famous Wang Hao! I am the world champion! Does it matter if I beat you?” shouted the 24-year-old, according to a witness quoted by the papers.”

I personally feel Wang should receive a position with the UN for saying this. That quote replaces my all-time quote “I got the poo on me” which was from the movie Joe Dirt.

Of course Wang would be my newest idol if he would have incorporated the phrase “I’m Wang Hao bitch!” sometime during this altercation.

Of course the national table tennis team denied the incident at first and claims that Wang only was sober at the time, which still doesn’t explain the urination factor.

Spain is working feverishly on a new team picture.

“There was no drunkenness or brawling. There was just an argument,” Monday’s Shanghai Morning Post quoted China national team manager Huang Biao as saying.

“Because Wang is a celebrity, the story has been amplified.”

Nonetheless Wang will face punishment and we all know how China doles out punishment don’t we? Uh huh…hopefully he will live through it.

Wang told the government controlled press that he lost a match over the weekend and basically turned to alcohol and that he has learned his lesson from this incident.

“It taught me that I have to be very careful about anything I say or do,” Wang told state broadcaster CCTV.

Wang will also reportedly receive counseling. I wonder what kind of counseling though. Remember this is a country that gave two women (One was blind) who were over 70, “Reeducation through work” counseling for protesting in an area that was designated for protesting during the past Olympics.

Posted in China, Karaoke, Ping Pong, Urination, Wang Hao, drunk | Tagged: , , , , , | 1 Comment »

It didn’t take long for things to get ugly in Clemson

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on October 14, 2008

There is understandability a lot of turmoil when a head coach is replaced, especially when it occurs in the middle of the season. This move is somewhat unprecedented.

I believe it’s never good to fire a college coach in the middle of the season and there is only one coach that comes to mind who deserved to be ousted while the season wore on and that was Dennis Franchione of Texas A&M. Not because of his piss poor record but because he openly violated the HIPPA law concerning his own players and a certain “Insiders Only” newsletter.

Even though it’s wasn’t widely reported during his tenure at Clemson, Tommy Bowden had a habit of throwing his own players under the bus. As a player I can see why that would be disheartening and frustrating. It’s also the reason why he was cut short yesterday.

Let’s hope he makes a better ABC studio host than his retarded brother.

Cullen Harper, the senior Clemson quarterback, was benched after the Tigers’ loss to Wake Forest. He didn’t have the kindest things to say about his now former coach either.

“It’s what he deserved,” Harper said. “Dabo Swinney is a fine man and will do an excellent job.”

Harper stated that Bowden “tried to motivate us but guys were off the bandwagon. There were things I disagreed with and that my teammates disagreed with. I didn’t appreciate it when he would say some off-the-wall things about me to the media. I guess one thing I can say is he gave me an opportunity to come to Clemson and play.”

Going off the subject but this is a true story about Cullen Harper:

Year before last, while Harper was backing up Will Proctor, there was a party at one of the apartment complexes. Harper showed up to the party and was told he was persona non grata. Upon hearing this, he says, “Do you know who I am? I’m Cullen fucking Harper!”

The host of the event replied, “Oh. You’re the guy that’s gonna keep the seat warm until Willy Korn gets here? Get the fuck out, scrub.”

It couldn’t have happened to a bigger douche bag. OK, back to the article.

Harper’s daddy who played on the 1980 Georgia national championship team agrees with his son.

“I’d call it karma,” he said. “I thought it needed to be done. I think anytime a head coach or someone in a leadership position starts to place blame on his coaches and players, it weakens their respect on the team. His past experiences have shown he’s done that.”

CJ Spiller really leveled some with his comments. By the way Spiller seems to agree with me regarding it really wasn’t Bowden who was the problem but rather it was Rob Spence whom Bowden was loyal too.

I’m shocked. We are 3-3 because we didn’t make enough big offensive plays,” Spiller said. “I’m shocked by our record and now I’m shocked that our coach is gone.

“I enjoyed playing for coach Bowden and I liked him, but in the end he was yelling at us to be leaders and it wasn’t working. He did all he could to motivate us but guys weren’t buying into what he was saying. And he said a lot of the same things over and over again.

“He let the offensive coordinator [Rob Spence] run the show and we got away from me and James [Davis]. I think part of the problem was when he benched Cullen. Some people wanted the offensive coordinator fired, [Bowden benched] the quarterback and then he got fired.”

This Clemson team reminds of my beloved Tennessee team. Neither team is playing with passion. I don’t care who it is, take last season’s New England Patriot team, if they do not play with passion they will not win. It’s that simple.

I think Clemson should be a very good job – and they should be able to lure someone away from a lower-level program with ease, or a coordinator at a bigger school.

Tyrone Willingham – your time is coming soon, then again I wonder if Jimbo Fisher is feeling ancy….

Posted in ACC Football, Clemson Tigers, Jimbo Fisher, Tommy Bowden | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »