Your Mother Slept With Wilt Chamberlain

A Sports Blog on why ALL Teams Suck…Again!

Archive for May 28th, 2009

Apparently Derrick Rose really is stupid

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on May 28, 2009

In less than 24 hours after the news broke about Memphis and “major” recruiting violations, there’s a brand new report that claims Derrick Rose needed a lot of help getting into a finer institute of higher learning.

The Sun-Times is reporting that four students at Simeon High School in Chicago, including Rose, had grades changed on their high school transcripts after graduation. The grade were changed and then mailed to colleges and then changed back once they were mailed. So far no one knows who changed the grades or even why, because it would not have affected the students high school eligibility however it is interesting to note that Rose and two other students affected were apart of Simeon’s back-to-back state championship teams. Amateurs… all I needed was a sharpie to change my F to an A.

Also altered on Rose’s transcript: He likes Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain. He’s not much into Yoga and he has half a brain. Ok I’m paraphrasing on that.

Now I know the very thought of some “one-and-done” player might have needed some help getting into a college is hard to fathom, but trust me it does happen. Since Rose is already in the NBA I suppose we’ll just have to take our anger elsewhere. I vote for booing the kids who misspell words during the televised spelling bee tonight.

Posted in Chicago Bulls, Derrick Rose, Memphis Tigers, NCAA Rules Violation, cheaters | Tagged: , , , , | 1 Comment »

Gators ripping off other Gators…lovely

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on May 28, 2009

School pride can be a wonderful thing and former Gator Anthone Lott has so much Florida pride that he refuses to commit crimes unless they are against other former Gators. 

The state of Florida has filed charges against Lott accusing him of theft, fraud and money laundering, for a crooked construction deal in which Lott took money from a bank construction loan, and then did none of the work he was hired for. Which was probably building a cross for Tebow or something.  The contractor at the other end of the loan was fellow former Gator Joseph Weary. Both men are apart of the 1996 championship team. Lott is definitely the 1% of 1% material that Meyer craves. 

Lott & Weary were actually in a civil suit over this very situation but settled out of court last year, but the state prosecutors have filed charges so the fat lady hasn’t sung yet. Maybe Steve Spurrier can be called into this case and dispense justice with his “Visor-of-Death.”  As long as he doesn’t disrespect the play-calling, I’m sure Lott will be welcome back in the athletic department anytime.

Posted in 1%, Crime & Punishment, Florida Gators, Gator Gangsters, Gator mafia, Steve Spurrier, Urban Meyer | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »