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Archive for the ‘College Football’ Category

Uh Oh…

Posted by Joel on September 4, 2008

After watching the game against UCLA, I am sad. Not because Tennessee lost, but looking at the schedule, guess who’s coming to Knoxville on Sept. 20. I think I might call in to work that following Monday, because the Jack Daniel’s will flow like the river that day…

Posted in College Football, Go Vols, NCAA, SEC, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee Volunteers | 2 Comments »

Yup…It’s Time…

Posted by Joel on September 4, 2008

No, we here at the site are not endorsing Obama, McCain, or any other candidate for President. Nor are we trying to say that Fulmer is a supporter of Obama, as far as we know.

This post is about one thing, and one thing that I as a long time fan of things Rocky Top thought I would not post: changes need to occur. Fulmer needs to go.

It was this time last year that, as a matter of fact 1 year ago, that I wrote this piece. It was after the UT-Cal game. I was truly in a dark place, a place that I arrived in by a lethal combination of Jack Daniel’s and a 3 month baby girl. Having a headache from liquor and crying kids is not a good combination. However, the seeds of my discontent were not sewn during that game, but back during the mid-90′s. Yes, the “glory” years of Tennessee football. Remember when Steve Spurrier famously said “You can’t spell Citrus without UT”??? Man that hurt, but it pretty much was the truth. Look at Fulmer’s record vs. Florida. Spurrier got a sick twisted pleasure flinging around the football against Tennessee. Those seeds were sewn during every completion that was caught by Green, Caldwell, Taylor, etc.

Peyton couldn’t beat Florida. True, but Fulmer couldn’t beat Florida either. Guess what??? It ain’t happening this year either. Florida has recently discovered that a running back can be more than an extra blocker for Tebow.

Georgia has owned UT since Richt got to Athens. Fulmer has owned Alabama, but the way things play out, not anymore with Satan coaching them.

The seeds of change have been sewn by all of the close losses over the years. Anyone remember the Notre Dame loss at Knoxville??? That game helped propel the legend of Brady Quinn, nevermind the blowout the next year in South Bend. Can’t forget Memphis in 1996 (I thought the Liberty Bowl would burn down after that one). What about the close wins versus Mississippi State, Vanderbilt, Ole Miss, South Carolina, Kentucky??? By and large, for the past 16 years, the dominant teams in the SEC have been (in no particular order) UT, LSU, Florida, Alabama, and Georgia. All of the other teams have decent years, but with all of the 1st and 2nd round draft picks that have played in Neyland Stadium, there is no way that Tennessee should have had blowout losses against few teams, much less Notre Dame a couple of years ago, Alabama last year, and Maryland in 2002 (Peach Bowl). Tennessee should have a lot better record for the past 16 years. Fulmer has more of a reputation of making Heisman Trophy candidates, like McGahee, Couch, McFadden, Grossman, etc.

My point is this: Fulmer has lived his time. Name another street after him. Name a luxury suite after him. Name Cell Block E of the Knoxville jail after him. But he needs to go. The past 6 years has shown that Mike Hamilton has been content for being good and not great. Pat Summitt is pretty much as untouchable as Smokey. Bruce Pearl has Tennessee basketball relevant and on a way upward trend. At this point, if Tennessee wins the national championship this year (quit laughing Thomas), I will still call for Fulmer’s job. I am fed up. I am sick of the goal line fumbles, the brilliance of Randy Sanders Dave Clawson’s play calling, the every other year of John Chavis having a good defense, the miscues on special teams, and the stubbornness of staying the course and “working like heck”. If a fan of another team makes fun of Fulmer being fat, whatever, he is. If another fan says “Man there is a lot of talent on the Vols. Why is the school happy to not play in BCS bowls??? What if Tressel had this speed??? Stoops himself couldn’t blow a Fiesta Bowl with your guy’s players.” It is sad, and I can’t take it anymore. Real change involves pink slips, and this Fulmer cat is out of lives. He can’t pull the “it is the coordinator’s fault” card. Eventually, you have to look at the man who hires the coordinator. The roots are grown, and harvest time is coming…

Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, College Football, Crime & Punishment, Florida Gators, Football Poll, Fulmer, Go Vols, NCAA, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee, Tennessee Volunteers, UT vols, football, fulmer sucks, vols | Leave a Comment »

Razorback Stadium

Posted by Joel on August 14, 2008

Donald W. Reynolds Razorback Stadium ranks 4th among the football stadiums in the SEC West. This is just my opinion. Truth be told, this is a hard ranking, because I would actually consider this not only one of the best stadiums in the SEC but one of the best college football stadiums that I have been to. I would even go so far as to say that it is better than some NFL stadiums (Oakland, Jacksonville, San Francisco, and Minnesota come to mind). The problem is that the other stadiums ahead of Razorback Stadium are that much better.

The passion of he Hog fans definitely rivals that of a lot of fanbases, all the way down to FOIA’s. I mean seriously, would Middle Tennessee State University fans file legal documents to see the text messages of the local hot reporter that he is banging friends with???

The one thing that I really do not understand about Razorback Stadium is that Arkansas also plays games in Little Rock at War Mmorial. Certainly I understand the historical relevance of the field, but if Razorback Stadium is so much nicer, why continue to play there??? It will be just another second home to Bobby Petrino until he packs his carpet bag and heads elsewhere (Notre Dame anyone)???

The sounds of pig sooie, coupled with great BBQ, friendly people, and passion not seen in the Big 10, gives Arkansas good, almost great. Too bad the stadium wasn’t built on the backs of human trafficking (hint to #3)…

So to recap so far:

SEC West Stadiums:

6. Ole Miss (Vaught-Hemingway Stadium)

5. Mississippi State (Wade Davis Stadium)

4. Arkansas (Wade Davis Stadium)

Posted in Arkansas Razorbacks, College Football, NCAA, SEC, SEC Football, Sports | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

Davis Wade Stadium: Croomed

Posted by Joel on August 8, 2008

Honestly, this was close to the bottom of the football stadiums in the SEC. In any given day, one could call this THE worst stadium in the SEC. But in the SEC West, Davis Wade Stadium is better in my opinion than Vaught Hemingway Stadium. I will get to that in a minute.

I had the pleasure of watching the Bulldogs play during the Jackie Sherrill era. Though I am sure Andrew Zimmern of Bizarre Foods would have loved to see Coach Sherrill castrate a steer so he could have a great tailgate meal, the fans were great and raucous. But not even a fifth of Jack Daniel’s with a 6 pack Budweiser chaser could drown out the damn cowbells out of my head.

The city of Starkville is a quiet college town. It is nice, and I really hate to talk trash about such a nice place. With that being said, the people of Starkville can proudly say “Hey, at least we ain’t Tuscaloosa”.

Davis Wade Stadium is like the employee at work that you have and he or she are just there. They do nothing to stand out and shine among their fellow employees, but they keep their head above water long enough so you can’t fire them. Plus, they are good every once in a while for a good laugh and to have a body around. When it comes time to give that employee an annual review, you give the an average score because that is what they are.

The one thing that I can’t stand in stadiums is the lack of a connection. There are ramps that connect all sides and that is it. There is not a continuous bowl. I am not a fan of this type of seating. But I don’t have to look at half of a sailboat when I look into the far endzone like Vaught Hemingway Stadium. But when a 3 story banner is the highlight of your place, it’s not good.

The one reason that I give Davis Wade a higher slot than Ole Miss is the fans. From the student section, to the band, to the old geezers just counting down until the post game food run to Ryan’s, the fans there were passionate about the Bulldogs. Definitely something I can appreciate. Plus, there is not the pretentious nature and arrogance of “The Grove”.

The school is in the process of upgrading the facilities, complete with a new scoreboard and JumboTron. Until then, this “little stadium that could” will continue to be the place where ranked teams go to get CROOMED!!!

Posted in College Football, Croom, NCAA, SEC, SEC Football, Sports, mississippi state bulldogs | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

The Worst Football Stadium In the SEC

Posted by Joel on August 5, 2008

Well unfortunately I have been having issues with the internet the past week. It seems that a combination of a 1 year old attempting to do pull ups by hanging on the the wireless card sticking out of your USB drive is not a good combination. Anyhow, I am somewhat back until the good people at S****t decide to send a new card.

While I was out, I began thinking about the game day experience in the SEC. The league is unique, and since I have had the chance to go to each football stadium at least once, I should share each experience. With the blessing of Thomas the Magnificent Terrible, I have decided to do a 12 part series on each stadium, starting with the SEC West. These rankings are based on my experience at the stadiums, including tailgating, seating comfort, sight lines, student sections, home field advantage for the home team, and overall feeling. With that, I present the worst stadium in the SEC:

Vaught-Hemingway Stadium: Built originally in 1915, this stadium has gradually increased from 24,000 to 60,000, or the equivalent size of LSU’s practice facility. The stadium itself is, for lack of a better word, fugly. I mean, if you are sitting in the north end zone, this is what you are looking at from across the field.

Never mind that the field is AstroPlay or whatever instead of real grass, the stadium itself is horrible. The student section was full of hot chicks and stuffy looking dudes in Polo shirts and trust funds, Rebel flags were waving, McAllister’s Deli commercials were blazing on the JumboTron, and Jerrell Powe still can’t read. As for home field advantage, I saw Ole Miss get pasted by Georgia 35-15. Why Georgia allowed 15 is still a wonder.

The Grove in and itself is a mixed bag. On one hand, the sheer number of hot chicks is astounding. They all dress in their Sunday best and when you see them, you wonder how the state of Mississippi can produce such beauty. On the other hand, the surrounding woods which are naturally nice looking is surrounded by this:

Also, while everyone is dressed up for the formal ass kicking the Rebels without a Mascot is about to take, I just can’t get over the Dollar General bags that the paper plates come in. Hot chicks cannot save the overall horrible stadium and douchebag fans. So overall, the worst football stadium in the SEC, and definitely the worst in the SEC West. I miss Coach O…

Posted in College Football, NCAA, Ole Miss, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, ole miss rebels | Tagged: , , , | 14 Comments »

I Miss Coach O

Posted by Joel on July 20, 2008

Ran across this video and it is a classic: “highlights” from the Egg Bowl last year between Ole Miss & Miss. St. Yup, this video pretty much sums up Coach O’s coaching career. I will miss him. If you will miss him like I will, as you watch this video recite these words in your head as Elvis sings: Yaw Yaw Yaw, Footbaw, & Wild Boyz…

Posted in College Football, Crime & Punishment, Ed Orgeron, NCAA, Ole Miss, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, coach o, mississippi state bulldogs, ole miss rebels, satire | Tagged: , , | 3 Comments »

Anyone Want To Run Notre Dame Athletics???

Posted by Joel on July 14, 2008

Kevin White, the man who fired more Notre Dame football coaches than anyone else, left for the “greener pastures” at Duke University on May 31. Since then, the school has been looking for the next guy to fire Charlie Weis athletic director. The school was recently turned down by ex-Irish football player Steve Orsini, currently the AD at SMU. Where does the school turn now, since the school was turned down by a man who played on the 1977 championship team and is currently at a school still feeling the sting of the NCAA “Death Penalty”???

Of course, I have an answer…

Right now, the school’s website does not have the AD’s job listed. They have a job posting for a parking lot attendant for game day (at $9.00/hr) and a Director of Gift Planning, who has the task of collecting fat checks from alums and “friends of the school”. They curiously do not have the AD’s position there. Why??? Did they run out of space??? Does the NBC contract not pay for internet???

My answer is tat bastion of both virtue and vice. User friendly and free, whether you want a lawn mower or a trashy dancer who works at the Nasty Tuna Club: Craigslist. I have posted the following in the jobs section of the Indianapolis site of Craigslist:

AD At ND???

How far has a school gone down the crapper that a proud alum has turned down the AD job??? Your current AD left for, of all places, Duke, because he won’t have boosters breathing down his neck as THEIR pick for a football coach racks up losses against USC and Navy. Oh, but Weis can’t win with Willingham’s recruits!!! Correction: Weis won with the “great” Brady Quinn, a Willingham recruit.

The reality is that Weis looked like a genius in the NFL because of Bill Bellichick and Tom Brady (a Michigan man). The reality is that as Jimmy “Beer Bong” Claussen and Evan “Scared To Play Behind Shaky O-Line” Sharpley continue to throw picks, and as Paul Hornung continues racist rants about “lowering academic standards” in order to “get the black athlete”, the program will slip into even more mediocrity as Fresno State, UConn, Oklahoma State and Texas Tech have all caught up to. USC is now light years ahead, but there is no shame in that. Ohio State can’t catch USC either, but OSU can’t catch a cold if it comes from the SEC…

*singing* 3 tears for old Notre Dame, can’t find an AD, that is a shame.

I hope that helps.

Posted in BCS, Brady Quinn, Charlie Weis, College Football, College Gameday, ESPN, Lee Corso, Michigan, Michigan Wolverines, NCAA, Notre Dame, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, Sports, boosters, football, jimmy clausen, notre dame sucks | 1 Comment »

Rich Rodriguez…Quitter…

Posted by Joel on July 10, 2008

Rich,

What the hell happened??? A settlement??? Are you kidding me??? What were you thinking??? You were supposed to stick it to the man, and instead you said that you give up.

I know, I know, Michigan forced it. Sure, they are footing the bill (which you created). I know, your new job bailed your maize and blue bottom out of the sizzling flames. It must be nice for Michigan to pull $3 million out of it’s war chest to cover you. Ironic, the new athletic facilities you were bitching and moaning about because they were non-existent, are now about to go full steam ahead thanks to you bolting for Michigan.

So now what??? How could you honestly look a kid in the eye and expect them to keep running gassers when they have nothing left??? You gave up. Some may say good for you leaving West Virginia. That is a question for another time. The issue at hand is that you quit WVU, created nuclear winter on your way out, got your new employer to pay your old employer, and in a few years you will probably leave again for the B.C. Lions of the Canadian Football League.

Honestly, you are no better than Nick Saban, your favorite fellow West Virginian. And like St. Nick, you will be lucky to go to a bowl game this year. Hooray, Michigan fans, the Scratch n’ Sniff.Com Bowl in Butte, Montana await you. And all for the low, low price of $36 million over the next 4 years. On top of it all, you managed to make West Virginia University something that Kinko’s bought MBA degrees couldn’t do. You made them look smart.

Of course, if you had Paul Rhoades, former defensive coordinator of Pitt, as your lawyer, you could have easily stopped the Mountaineers (13-9)…

Posted in Ass Whipping, BCS, Big East, Bill Stewart, Coach Rich Rodriguez, College Football, Football Poll, Lloyd Carr, Michigan, Michigan Wolverines, NCAA, Sports, WVU, West Virginia, West Virginia Mountaineers, big 10, big ten, big ten football, boo birds, boosters, dumbass, football | Leave a Comment »

Here’s A Way To Keep Gas Prices Down

Posted by Joel on July 7, 2008

Everyone is being affected by the high gas prices in our country right now. Our company, like most businesses, is seeing transportation and manufacturing costs rise almost exponentially. The average American is spending more on gas than at any time in our country’s history. Sadly, this trend, according to some analysts, will continue through the end of the year. Currently, Obama and McCain have included plans to help alleviate the energy crisis, and from barbershops to flea markets, everyone has an answer…including me ;-)

Yes, even a pagan such as myself has an answer to the gas crunch…

I would not dare suggest that we start drilling on the hallowed grounds of Notre Dame Stadium. But the Fighting Irish, warming up here last year against Navy (which Navy won), is the solution.

According to the World Almanac, in 1973, the average price of a gallon of gas in the U.S. was 51 cents a gallon. Notre Dame won the national title that year. Every year after, the price of gas went up on average of 3 cents a gallon. In 1977, gas was up to 65 cents a gallon. Notre Dame won the national title again. Gas prices did not rise again until 1979. But in 1980, gas went up into the 1 dollar range (right before the Gerry Faust era). When Lou Holtz delivered the Fighting Irish another title in 1986, gas actually went down to 93 cents, down from 1.20. Consequentially, gas prices experienced huge jumps in 1999 (when they were placed on probation under Bob Davie) and also in 2004 (when Ty Willingham was fired).

To me it is simple: We should all root for Notre Dame to win the national title this year. Get them a national TV contract. Continue to have high hopes for them, even if it may seem misguided. Give them a schedule that should guarantee some success. Like the great Paul Hornung said, “Get the black athlete”. Above all, someone in the national media, hell, make it two people in the national media, should stomp for them.

Only then the terrorists won’t win…Touchdown Jesus will…

Posted in ACC, ACC Football, Ass Whipping, BCS, Big East, Brady Quinn, Charlie Weis, College Football, DUI, Football Poll, NCAA, NCAA Rules Violation, NFL Draft, NFL Football, Notre Dame, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, Sports, University of Southern Cal, ass chewing, big 10, big ten, big ten football, boo birds, boosters, cheaters, drunk, football, notre dame sucks, tyrone Willingham | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

1,2,3…Cut The F’n Tree!!!

Posted by Joel on June 4, 2008

These days, there are a few things that are peeking my interest whenever time permits me (seeing as though this is Christmas time in the swimming pool industry). These things include the following: the R. Kelly Trial (click here for the Chicago Sun Times blog on the perv’s trial), Hell’s Kitchen (thank God that puss Matt finally got voted off), and Cal-Berkeley vs. the Tree People. These long days of summer where I am stuck dealing with jackass customers and stuck at work while others are enjoying vacation totally suck, but these are ample distractions. The R. Kelly Trial is interesting to me because this fool had everything but could not stay away from the girls with the Trapper Keepers, just like predecessors Gary Glitter, Michael Jackson, and Jerry Lee Lewis. Hell’s Kitchen is just funny because Gordon Ramsay has just become my favorite Brit. Actually, I watch BBC America whenever his Kitchen Nightmare shows are on and I discovered a show called Footballer’s Wives that had Playmaker’s and 1st and Ten beat by a long shot.

And then there is the loooooooooong drawn out court battle between the University of California vs. some coked out, tree hugging, Birkenstock wearing hippies. I still can’t believe that these godless pagans beat Tennessee last year, but I digress. I know this is about to piss of AB, but seeing as though the tree people can’t possibly be getting internet access, maybe she can send them a smoke signal from the backyard of her palatial estate.

I don’t see how this school is still participating in major D-1A sports. If I were the Pac-10, I would kick them out and bring in Fresno State. At least the football program would have more upsets against top competition and the cheerleaders would have a little more “urbanism” than the grandecafemochachocolatte $10 cups of coffee the prissy Blackberry toting chicas at Berkeley.

As a native Southerner, it amazes me that a few people are actually trying to save 100 year old trees. They are letting these trees get in the way of a perfectly good football stadium and practice facility. What good are some oak trees when your football team plays mediocre football??? Well then again, this is Cal football we are talking about. Don’t worry Cal: USC, Oregon, Arizona St., and Oregon St. will be dropping half a hundred a piece on you in no time. Keep the trees, and pray that you can keep your coach. Besides, surely the school could make use of some fresh cut trees. I mean, wood will still be needed for the new locker rooms, luxury suites, doors, and paper for the playbooks. Let’s just call it a recycling program.

You know, something looks familiar about that damn Cal bear…

Posted in Arizona State Sundevils, BCS, Cal, College Football, Fresno State, NCAA, Pac 10, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee Volunteers, University of California berkeley, boosters, crazy | Tagged: , | Leave a Comment »