This would have been posted earlier but I kinda sorted screwed up and forgot to send Joel the bowl schedule. Yeah, my bad, I’m a dick. Whatever. Anywho let’s go over this year bowl schedule and mine and Joel’s picks and then you call your bookie.
This year there is a smorgasbord of crap-tastic games to choose from! Yay!
EagleBank Bowl When: Dec. 20, 11 a.m., ESPN Where: Washington Who: Navy vs. Wake Forest
Joel says: Anchors aweigh. I really wish Navy would have beat Notre Dame again this year. Wait, this is a real bowl game???
Thomas says: I pick Navy because I’m sick and damn tired of hearing how the Wake Forest is so good. Blah blah blah. Is this bowl game being funded by any of the bailout money by the way? Read the rest of this entry »
Yes this season looks bleak especially if you’re a sports fan. If you’re like me and is forced…FORCED damn it…to participate in the office “Secret Santa” then get them a crap-tastic sports gift.
What says “You’re a gold digging whore” to that slutty office person who is constantly raving on about how drinks she scored for free over the weekend by offering over hyped cleavage and a lack of substance better than an ESPN Monopoly game?
Is Erin Andrews on the community chest cards?
This ties into the biggest thing that bothers me about ESPN – they in large part dictate the sports narratives of the day. Public opinion regarding an issue, player, or team can literally be shaped by ESPN now. So when the BCS goes to ESPN, not only will ESPN’s tune change on the issue of a college football playoff, but you can bet that public opinion will as well.
Know anyone that ever wanted to smell like JoePa’s adult diapers? Then here’s your chance to make them happy while grossing out their cubical neighbors.
Masik is a company that “specializes” in collegiate fragrances.
They offer colognes in the following schools:
UNC: When Just Looking Like Stu Scott Ain’t Enough, Bro. WARNING: do not spray directly in eyes.
Penn State: Musk, passion, wrinkles…Joe Paterno Moth Balls fragrance
And coming soon!
Florida: When being a douche-bag isn’t enough and you can smell like one.
Georgia: Boone’s Farm and urinal cakes with subtle notes of denial.
Alabama: mixture of baby back ribs, dead Behr and bacon is tantalizing to the ladies.
Tennessee: concoction of whiskey in a jar and Lane Kiffin
Auburn: heady combination of sinsemilla and ass.
LSU: A subtle blend of coonass and corndogs.
To bad they don’t make one for Oregon St Beavers the women’s version could embody the true essence…
Of course if you have an asshole boss like me get them a Redsox coffin. The special edition Ted Williams model comes with built-in air conditioning.
Yes folks I decided to take some time away from writing and enjoy the Thanksgiving weekend, I hope you had a pleasant and happy Thanksgiving.
I dub yesterday as disappointment day with the exception of Tennessee. I don’t mean to gloat, well…actually I do but this is the worst team that Tennessee has even placed on the field and yet Kentucky still couldn’t beat them. The streak lives on because Tennessee is Tennessee and Kentucky is Kentucky.
I’ll have a full write up on that game tomorrow.
Notre Dame put up a fight against USC at least until kickoff occurred. The Irish kept interrupting the Trojans’ pregame warmups which resulted in punches thrown and the Po Po intervening. Of course in the end Southern Cal proved what everyone knows and that is Notre Dame is a horrid team. Next stop on the Brian Kelly rumor-mill…why I’m betting Notre Dame.
Georgia seriously screws my picks up and loses to Georgia Tech.
Same old South Carolina, they still can’t beat their arch rivals the Clemson Tigers even though Clemson has an interim head coach. Hopefully this win will lead to Clemson offering the job to Dabo Swinney.
The Ole Ball (Sac) Coach is plenty mad after this embarrassment which lead Spurrier to degrade his players even further publicly. Honestly I’m wondering if he has lost this team. The reason I say that is because at the end of the game South Carolina tried to start a fight instead of shaking hands…classless.
Florida did what everyone thought they would do and beat up Florida State.
With Boston College and Virginia Tech both winning yesterday it looks like a rematch is set for the ACC title game. The same game that didn’t sell 50% of the tickets last year. Joy…
Alabama ends the Auburn winning streak they had against Bama…rather soundly at that. Time will tell if Auburn is foolish enough to fire Coach Turbeville.
No Rose bowl for you Oregon State, unless by some miracle UCLA can upset Southern Cal. Oregon State got hammered by the ugly uniform wearing Ducks of Oregon.
Oklahoma and Oklahoma State was a closer game than what the score indicates and it was a great game. Hats off to both teams.
Let’s be honest. Yesterday offered a plethora of crappy games. On the bright side my beloved VOLS didn’t lose, of course they didn’t play but that’s not the point.
Clemson light Duke up. One more win and they’re bowl eligible.
Will Ron Zook be asked to step down after losing yet another game?
Look out Notre Dame is now bowl eligible even though Navy had a chance to win it in the end. Charles Weis really needs to look into doing some push-ups.
Georgia and the penalties they accrue almost cost them the game against Auburn.
Florida hammered South Carolina which is absolutely hilarious to me. Living in Columbia you should have heard all the things the Cock fans were saying. Deuce Staley actually said on his weekly radio talk show, “Carolina’s defense can match up with anyone’s speed in the country.” Really Deuce? You couldn’t tell from their performance yesterday.
I continuously laugh when I watch TV ads for other schools. And then a Florida ad comes on. “Go Gators. Go cure cancer.” Oh, that seems pretty simple. Tebow will take care of that in between circumcisions this off-season.
Does anyone really want to win the ACC?
Miami should be thanking Maryland for beating North Carolina.
Wisconsin discovered something called a forward pass and beat Minnesota with it.
Has anyone noticed that Nebraska is bowl eligible yet?
Missouri wins the Big 12 North…yes people that still exists.
Florida State couldn’t control penalties & Boston College’s running game at the same time.
It can be said: Vandy is bowl eligible. Kentucky might have been still mourning the humiliating loss the basketball received at the hands of VMI the night before.
Washington is still winless go figure.
Houston doesn’t have a problem as they rack up 70 points against Tulsa.
LSU almost embarrassed themselves and the SEC yesterday.
Michigan endures their first 8 loss season ever. I’m sure they’re glad they hired Rich Rodriguez now.
Thank God there’s more chaos in the polls this week and here is a newsflash: Tennessee sucks really sucks. I’ll have a complete write up on their game tomorrow after I review the tape today.
Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez will be home this holiday season because for the first time in 33 years the Michigan Wolverines will not be bowling. The last time that happened it was 1975.
Look for West Virginia to be ranked later today.
Central Michigan gets an upset victory over Indiana. Don’t worry Hoosier fans you have basketball season to look forward to. Oh wait no you don’t.
I feel your pain fan Wisconsin fans.
Minnesota gets upset by that smart Big 11 10 team known as Northwestern.
Miami is a dangerous team to play just ask Virginia.
Houston Nutt continues to impress as Ole Miss defeated Auburn.
Kansas opened a can of whip ass on K-State.
Arkansas gets an upset victory over Tulsa.
Way to go Pitt, you’re still relevant.
Miss State you’re not relevant.
Cal gets the upset win verses Oregon.
Georgia Tech continues to win.
Florida took revenge for the last year’s loss again Georgia & set themselves up to make a run.
It was the last game of Texas’s gauntlet but Texas Tech spoiled the party and remains undefeated. Now will Oklahoma be ranked above Texas Tech? That really wouldn’t be fair would it since they just defeated the team that handed Oklahoma their only loss of the season. This is why we need a playoff structure.
Duke was so close but yet so far away yesterday.
North Texas…what a week…12 players fail drug tests and yet they still managed a victory yesterday.
Oh my God Syracuse actually won a game yesterday.
Don’t look now but Oregon State is almost bowl eligible.
It sucks to be a Tennessee fan this season however I’ll still support them no matter what. As always a complete write up on the Tennessee/Alabama game will be tomorrow after I torture myself by watching a replay of the game.
There were other teams in action yesterday. Let’s look and see what we have learned from yesterday.
UCONN got back on the Big Least track by hammering Cincinnati.
Indiana upset the smarties of Northwestern.
Apparently Boston College doesn’t want too go to the ACC championship game.
Wisconsin finally won a game by beating the fighting Zookers of Illinois.
Here’s a piece of advice: never schedule Texas Tech as a homecoming game. Just ask the Kansas Jayhawks.
The fall of Wake Forest and the rise of Miami as begun.
Minnesota is 7-1 and for real.
The gaytors of Florida hammered Kentucky by blowing them out by 58 points. Hey did they steal your plays as well?
Oklahoma scored 55 points in the 1st half against Kansas State but only 3 in the 2nd half. Oklahoma still handily won the game.
Vandy is still not bowl eligible and Couch Cut picks up another win for Duke.
Florida State beat Virginia Tech, that and the fact Virginia beat Georgia Tech means Virginia of all ACC teams is on top of the Coastal division in the ACC.
Look out folks Louisville might be back, they upset South Florida yesterday.
The beast known as Georgia reared its head yesterday by hanging 52 points at LSU. As you can see from the photo LSU fans is thrilled at all. (Click on it)
Trends started at Rutgers…
1. College football (1866)
2. Giving the finger to hovering HD cameras at college football games (2008)
For the first time in 10 years Michigan State beat Michigan at Michigan. I’m sure things are getting hot for Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez.
Texas barely wins against Oklahoma State. Folks this Oklahoma State is for real just America’s coach, Mike Gundy.
Pittsburgh was doing well but they regressed yesterday while Rutgers beat them.
Missouri took some frustration out on Colorado yesterday.
Texas A&M beat Iowa State. Check this video out. You have to love fans whose team is not performing well talking shit about the other teams. This video is hilarious!!!
JoePa gets his first win at the horseshoe since 1978 as Penn State beats Ohio State officially knocking them from playing in this year’s title game.
Washington is still winless and Notre Dame is 5-2. They could become ranked this week.
Houston Nutt took Ole Miss in to Arkansas handed them another loss. I’m he is savoring that one.
Ahh…another Saturday of college football has past us by. No real upsets to speak of however it was another great smorgasbord of games with some thrilling endings.
Don’t let the Tennessee score fool you. My complete wrap-up of that game will be tomorrow.
Everyone remember BYU? You know they’re the team with the unstoppable offense that was going to bust the BCS this year. Well TCU has something to say about that.
South Florida keeps in the mix of the Big Least by rolling over Syracuse.
Look out the smarty Northwestern team is now bowl eligible. They beat Purdue handily and this has to be Joe Tiller’s last season.
Maryland is like Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde of the ACC that or Wake Forest just wants to avoid a trip to Tampa and a chance to play in the ACC championship game.
Wow Rutgers actually won a game.
Georgia Tech upended Clemson. This was Dabo Swinney’s first game as interim head coach. I noticed that the AD was on the sidelines because he said something that obviously Swinney didn’t like.
If I was Swinney I would simply blame the AD at the post-game press conference.
“That play that got Korn injured, that was the AD’s call. The hook & ladder play it was the AD’s as well. I figured since he was on the sidelines interfering with my coaching he could call some of the plays”
Seriously folks the AD doesn’t belong on the sidelines. He should have been in the luxury suites entertaining the alumni.
Texas Tech manages to get the offense rolling and defeats Texas A&M.
Wisconsin once was ranked as high as #10 in the country, dropped their 3rd game in a row while taking a beating from Iowa.
Georgia sloppily beat Vandy. Vandy is looking to become bowl eligible.
Oklahoma State is 7-0 for the first time since the 1940′s.
Everyone though Michigan State had turned a corner…then they met Ohio State yesterday. It wasn’t pretty.
Oklahoma might the 4th in the country but they’re also 4th in their division.
I’m one of the few people that actually took Virginia to beat North Carolina.
Ole Miss. gave Alabama a huge scare. Alabama starts fast and fails to finish big.
Michigan looked awesome in the first half against Penn State. To bad the game has a second half.
Kentucky rallied 2 touchdowns in about the final minutes of the game to defeat Arkansas.
Don’t look now but Pittsburgh is now 5-1.
Hey did you know that Virginia Tech played Boston College last night? It was actually a decent game and Virginia Tech, like Wake Forest, doesn’t want too go to the ACC championship game either.
California gets ranked the second time in the season just to get beaten again.
South Carolina fails to win a third game in a row. (Snicker)
Finally. My beloved Red Sox are still alive thanks to this fat-ass. Of course TBS has an epic fail due to technically difficulties.
“Two circuit breakers in our Atlanta transmission operations tripped causing the master router and its backup – which are necessary to transmit any incoming feed outbound – to shut down. This impacted our live feed from being distributed to any of the other networks in the Turner portfolio and caused the delay in our coverage. Both our primary and backup routers were impacted by this problem. We apologize to baseball fans for this mishap that caused a delay in our coverage.”
Everyone wanting to watch the game in the U.S. had to wade through about 20 minutes of a rerun of the Steve Harvey Show, and missed BJ Upton’s solo home run in the bottom of the first inning.
I’m no expert on TV transmission system design, but wouldn’t you think that your backup system would be isolated from your main system such that a circuit breaker going down wouldn’t take them both off line? Isn’t that, you know, the point of a backup system?
Way to go TBS…& where is the apology to those that might be upset about missing the last 10 minutes of the show? They might have wanted to see more wacky shenanigans.
Where do I begin? Let’s start with awful and move to hopeless and finish with WTF.
Image courtesy of the 3rd Saturday in Blogtober
With that being said let’s briefly go another route. I had the pleasure of the watching the game with my best friend who is a diehard Georgia fan. He pointed out 3 very questionable calls that resulted in 45 yards of penalties. The no contact pass interference, the helmet to helmet shot and wasn’t a helmet to helmet shot and late hit out of bounds that really should have been a no call. Even the announcers were surprised at those calls.
However that doesn’t excuse the nonexistent running game and the fact the defense had one of the worse games of the season.
This team is as offensively challenged as Brittany Spears is crazy. My question is what is the real problem? Is it Fulmer or Clawson? Fulmer still backs Clawson for the moment.
“The plans are good,” Fulmer said. “They’re sound. We just don’t execute like we need to. All of us need to do better.”
“He’s got the head phones on and he’s certainly aware of everything we’re doing,” Clawson said. “He certainly lets me call the game. I’m responsible for the offense.”
Well I can certainly rest easier at night knowing that. *Sarcasm*
The fight and fire does seem to continue to burn inside Fulmer however for how much longer is anyone’s guess. He knows what is coming within this coming week.
“Everybody in the world is going to talk about me,” Fulmer said. “They’re going to talk about our staff. They’re going to talk about (the players) and what kind of backbone we’ve got.
“Look ‘em in the eye and say, ‘I’m not quitting.’ Who’s going to stand up? They got to go on campus, out and about. They better be able to look them in the eye and say, ‘Hey, I did my best.’ That’s the staff, and that’s me and that’s everybody else.”
I hate to say this but sometimes ones best just isn’t good enough anymore. It’s not that Phil hasn’t done a lot of great things for UT but let’s face it, when he continues to run the same plays year after year, the opposing coaches get a lot of tape and figure out the best way counter it. See Urban Meyer, Mark Richt and Nick Saban. Any coach that looks at those schemes against UT can mount a good game plan against the offense and it is currently and has been happening a lot in the past 4 years.
Has Coach Fulmer’s career come down to whether the VOLS win or lose come this Saturday? It depends on whether if you believe the glass is half empty or half full.
For those that believe the glass is half empty then the most obvious answer is yes. They can simply point out to the current record of their beloved VOLS. Tennessee (2-3) is last in the SEC East, and only two other teams in the entire conference stands at 0-2 in SEC play. Those are Arkansas and Mississippi State.
When Josh Briscoe says things like “If we play the way we did Saturday, we won’t beat many (Southeastern Conference) teams” after the meager 13 point performance like last Saturday night, it does cause some to wonder.
Statements like that also cause a great deal of anguish and stress to those whose glasses remain half empty. Those that believe their glass is half empty believe their booing is a badge of honor.
Of course the Tennessee Coach Phillip Fulmer and his players aren’t exactly helping their situation either. When asked if this Saturday’s showdown with the SEC Eastern Conference rival Georgia was a must win Fulmer was quick to answer.
“It’s all of the above,” Fulmer said. “It’s not business as usual. This is a very important time for us as we fight like heck to stay in the championship mix and hope somebody else gets beat.”
Tennessee is in the bottom half of the SEC in 10 major offensive categories, including last in pass efficiency (102.6) and first downs (15.8 per game).
The opening point spread is Georgia by 13 and any glass half empty person will quickly point out how 13 is the unluckiness of all.
“But we brought it on ourselves,” Quarterback Nick Stephens said. “We didn’t really play as well as we could have the first couple of games.
“It’s to be expected.”
It might be expected, but to most it’s not accepted. Of course the people whose glass remains half empty will also quickly point out about how Fulmer has a 9 lives and a contract for life, then their glass goes from being half empty to ¾ empty. Read the rest of this entry »
This has been an extremely busy week for stories involving NFL players that aren’t necessarily related to the heroism players show each and every Sunday. In fact most of them are very un-hero like. There’s so many that I don’t possibly have the time to write about them all.
So instead of writing boring stories with humorous & snarky quips, I’m just going to write a few lines and link them. After all that’s better nothing right? Yeah…that’s what I thought.
As we know former Tennessee God and Denver running back Travis “I gots 9 Mf’ing 9 kids” Henry’s baby mommas gots to get paid! Now since he is technically unemployed he decided to the next best thing and that is set up a drug deal involving cocaine.
Problem is he was busted. His new teammates Malice and Pusha T are disapointed and are dropping him from the Re Up Gang. Hey Henry remember don’t get Mile High on your own supply.
“Then, Owens turned his attention to Johnson, who he referred to as “Sheshawn” on three separate occasions, the Star-Telegram reported.
(As the No. 1 overall pick in the 1996 draft) he is the ultimate underachiever on that (ESPN) panel. I am the reason he is in the booth,” Owens said. “Everybody is aware when I was brought to Dallas, he was the one they let go to get me here.”
And Sheshawn’s in the booth to replace Michael Irvin. ‘Cause Michael’s a crack head.
When Terrell ever gets fed up with Romo, ooh, what a nickname he has in store. Here’s a hint:
“Smith scored his first touchdown of the season on a 54-yard pass from Jake Delhomme late in the second quarter, then presented the ball to Lucas on the sideline.”
Apparently Plaxico Burress has some issues with being tardy and is paying the price with fines. Sarah Palin’s daughter had that ‘late’ problem too, but mom wouldn’t let her throw money at her problem to take care of it. (Oh no I didn’t)
Eli Manning should hook Plaxico up with one of his Citizen watches.
Some people took the Georgia loss real hard over the weekend. Danny Ware a former Georgia player and current New York Giants running back took it extremely hard by getting drunk and arrested.
Ware and a 24-year-old Dallas woman attracted a police officer’s attention at about 2:25 a.m. Sunday at East Clayton Street near North Jackson Street because they seemed oblivious to traffic that had to steer around them as they stood in the street talking, according to police.
Ware admitted that he’d been drinking, and a breath test showed he had a blood-alcohol content of 0.152 grams, police said.
Lovely he wasn’t even driving he was just trying to get a hook up for later. I wonder if he feels worse about Georgia losing or the fact he’s a drunken pedestrian that was busted while wearing temporary Bulldog tattoos stuck to his face (“cheek flair”) which adds another level of humiliation.
“Vince definitely is going to have to win the locker room back. As bad as Pacman was when he left the building or at 3 o’clock in the morning, it never interfered with his football. He loved football. Loved practice. The guys loved him. Players are going to be on your side if you show that you’re going to help them win. Vince has to prove that to this team.”
Further proof that football players care mostly about whether their teammates are helping them win, something Young was not doing.
Not only does he have to worry if Terrell Owens will finally blow his lid but Jerry Jones must pay $25,000 to NFL for flapping his mouth about Ed Hochuli. Terrell Owens just laughs and laughs.
I’ll show love to baseball as well.
Even though he no longer coaches the Dodgers some people in San Francisco harbor ill feelings towards Tommy Lasorda by getting all pissy because he’s the grand marshal in the Italian American parade.
Supervisor Michela Alioto-Pier wants organizers of the San Francisco Italian American parade to boot Tommy Lasorda as grand marshal … He’s the former manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers, who’ve had “an intense rivalry” with our hometown Giants for years and “nobody embodies that more than Tommy Lasorda,” states the resolution … The Giants aren’t doing so great, it continues, and “Dodger fans are boastful and smug.”
For someone in San Francisco to call another person smug is rather hypocritical. Of course maybe they would prefer Joe Torre instead.
Everyone knows Eddie Vedder recorded a song for the Chicago Cubs right? Not to be left out the Tampa Bay Devil Rays have to have a song as well. However the best they could muster was Kevin Costner and his band “Modern West” penning them a diddy titled “It’s All Up To You.”
The song can be heard here, but be forewarned that one listen may cause cerebral hemorrhaging, blindness & the sudden love of shitty music.
Just in case you want to sing along, though:
“You got to swing for the fence, give a hundred percent,
“Dust yourself off, get up and do it again.
“You’re the only one that can make your dreams come true.