Posted by Joel on June 29, 2008
When I wrote this article, I knew it would get a reaction. NEVER did I think it would get this type of reaction, although similar posts about Kentucky basketball have gotten much more traffic than anything else. With that said, instead of responding to every comment, I will post this and let the chips fall where they may…
Regarding my name and avatar, my real name is Joel. I chose to post under my own name because I am my own person. I understand why someone would want to have a different username, but not me. Nothing worng with it in my opinion, but that is how I roll. I chose to use The Pyramid Arena in Memphis because I am a proud native Memphian. I am also proud to be from the great state of Tennessee. Even though I attended Tennessee State University in Nashville (after deciding not to attend Columbia University, Brown University, Morehouse college, or the University of North Carolina, all offering academic scholarships while I was in high school), I still support all things Volunteer and all things regarding Memphis Tiger basketball. Equally, on this site, I have personally made fun of both. Examples of me making fun of Tiger basketball can be found here, here, and here. I do live and die Memphis Tiger basketball, despite the recent heartbreak of the title game and lack of national titles (unlike Kentucky). A few of my favorite posts of satire of Tennessee can be found here, here, and here. There have been other things that we have touched upon, including West Virginia football, Alabama, and the Miami Dolphins during their “run” to futility. Check out the “April Fool’s Day” page .The original and still current mantra of this blog is “A Sports Blog On Why ALL Teams Suck”. It just so happened that I did one on Kentucky, and things went bat shit. Of course, I was hoping people to understand sarcasm but I guess I expected too much.
First off, I do actually work during the day and I am not around a computer until I get home. So if you are pissy about anything I have written, cool it until later in the evening. I am not some snot nosed college kid or an unemployed bum watching Judge Judy and ESPN First Take all day.
Second, the only mistake I made (I feel) is making the title “Wanna be an NBA Player???” It was intended to sarcastically point out that Kentucky hasn’t had an NBA lottery player in a long time and a first round player drafted in a few years. That is a fact, as confirmed by John Clay of the Lexington Herald Ledger (he even called my work crude. I feel honored). But some of you Kentucky fans pointed out how Rajon Rondo just won an NBA championship with Boston and Tayshaun Prince has just been named to the Olympic team. Kudos. The fact of the matter is that Rondo was on a great team and while point guard is an important position, Paul Pierce handled the ball more than any other Celtic during the title run. Thomas the Terrible could have run point guard and the Celtics were still going to win it all. As for Prince, while he has been a valued member of the Pistons, there is no way I would have picked him over Tyson Chandler, Amare Stoudamire, Tim Duncan, Kevin Garnett, or even Paul Pierce. I am not the only one of this opinion.
Here is the bigger issue though: What is the real reason for the swarm of reaction??? Is it because the fanbase of Kentucky basketball is that fragile??? Or, did the truth really hurt??? Let’s look at these two questions.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted in Adolph Rupp, All SEC Teams Beware!!, Ass Whipping, Billy Clyde, Billy Gillispie, College Basketball, Cry Baby, ESPN, Fights, Kentucky Wildcats, NCAA, SEC, SEC Basketball, SEC Coaches, Sports, alcoholics, ass chewing, basketball, boo birds, boosters, cat killer, classless, crazy, satire | Tagged: Rupp Arena, Was Rupp Racist | 20 Comments »
Posted by Joel on June 27, 2008
I finally get some time to put up a post and it just so happens to be right after the 1st round of the NBA Draft . Then something came over me: Our favorite overrated, elitist, ass backwards, and drunken coached team from the SEC didn’t have a player drafted in the 1st round. This makes the second year in a row that a Kentucky player was not drafted in the 1st round, and continues the 11 year streak since a Wildcat player was picked in the lottery.
Oh don’t worry Wildcat fan. I know where to place the blame. It was “10 Loss” Tubby’s fault. He was too busy making sure he ran a clean program, free of racism (unlike the arena named after the “great” Rupp), and made sure that he didn’t hit the Wild Turkey bottle and try to drive home from the bar. He just simply didn’t have time to recruit players who would be developed into NBA talent.
Leave it to Billy Clyde Gilispie to recruit like a mother. He has already scored top 10 talent of all ages. He will take Kentucky back to single digit losses in just a few short years, as soon as his 8th grade recruits start arriving to Lexington. Too bad he said he was gonna stop recruiting young kids. Rumor is that he had planned to recruit Chicago next week while school is out for the summer. R. Kelly was gonna show him where all the hot spots were to get top talent, before Mr. Kelly got some talent of his own. Of course, knowing Billy Clyde’s track record, he’ll be gone quicker than you can say “Nick Saban”. It’s all good anyway, the best coach in the state left you back in the 90′s and now coaches your in-state rival.
So, for all of the Derrick Jasper’s, Scotty Hopson’s, and (insert latest player’s name to leave the Kentucky program here) of the world, things will be ok. You will make it to the NBA Draft Lottery, because you never put on the Wildcat uniform.
Let’s hear Tim Brando spin another year of Kentucky mediocrity…
Posted in Adolph Rupp, All SEC Teams Beware!!, Billy Clyde, Billy Gillispie, College Basketball, Cry Baby, DUI, Dead Drunk, ESPN, Evil Empire, Kentucky Wildcats, Liar, Louisville, Louisville Cardinals, NBA, NCAA, SEC, SEC Basketball, SEC Coaches, Sports, alcoholics, bad drivers, basketball, boosters, cat killer, draft pick, drunk, satire | Tagged: Kentucky, Rupp Arena, Tim Brando, UK | 110 Comments »
Posted by Joel on May 4, 2008
RIP Eight Belles
For you gave your life through & through.
Now as you lie on a cold slab for autopsy,
Your remains will soon become glue.
You were an amazing philly,
Trying to chase the men.
All for a few bucks,
Gold diggin’ until the end.
The way you ran that race,
And snapped your front sticks.
All so your owners can get some cash;
Is their last name Vick???
As you go out
Into the great sky.
I hope you meet Barbaro in heaven
As your earthly bodies will take an hour to dry…
RIP Eight Belles…
Posted in satire, scandal | Tagged: Barbaro, Eight Belles, glue factory, horse racing, Kentucky Derby | 2 Comments »
Posted by Little Bear Cub on April 1, 2008
Alana Colette Connell is one sexy lady. And don’t you dipshits forget it. You clandestine sissy boys made fun of her last year kissing Nick Saban and getting arrested for DUI immediately afterwards. You fans of other schools are just jealous that a woman would take off of her job at Dollar General to attend a pep rally for the new coach. You wish you had fans as dedicated to the Capstone as Ms. Connell. She’s a Cougar.
Now that’s a fan. So what she had a few drinks too many? The cop that arrested her was a Barner. Those numbnuts from the Barn are just sooooooooooooooo jealous of our 12 prizes and the Paul “Bear” Bryant Museum. Remind me again who the fuck Pat Dye was? That’s right animal lovers, he ain’t even Bill Curry. Leave our George Dickel drinking cougar alone.
Oh, and to show you some more talent from Tuscaloosa, not that these jackasses on this site know what beauty is, here you go:
Roll Tide Roll Bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted in Alabama, Alabama Crimson Tide, All SEC Teams Beware!!, Auburn, BCS, Bammers, Mascots, NCAA, Nick Saban, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, SEC Speed, Saban, Scams, Sex Video, boosters, satire, scandal | Tagged: Colette Connell, cougar, UAB | 6 Comments »