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It Could Be Worse…At Least We Aren’t…

Posted by Joel on September 30, 2008

Obviously, this year’s edition of Volunteer has officially gone down the crapper. Visiting any number of Volunteer blogs will do nothing more than depress you. Well I am here to cheer up fans of Rocky Top. Even though the days of acutally competing with Top 10 teams and being considered the upper crust of the SEC are gone, and Fulmer’s coaching career have gone down quicker than a 50 cent stripper on 2 for 1 night, things could be worse. The hard working folks at Losers With Socks asked a very intriguing question, “What is worse than the Tennessee Offense?”  Well that got me to thinking, what if Tennessee football was meant to suck??? Since I am a glass is half full type of person, and we here at YMSWWC consider ourselves “Solutions Oriented”, I have decided to cheer up the fans by saying that it could be worse…at least we aren’t…

I cannot tell if these guys are entering the practice field stadium for the next loss or leaving because they wanna hit the internet and read about the next 8 year old that Billy Clyde just signed. See, the school thinks football is that sport that gets in the way of basketball. So let us examine some of the “fine points” of Kentucky football, and Wildcat fans, you should be ashamed.

  • They can’t get Ashley Judd to show up there. Who could blame her.
  • When Bear Bryant coached there, he was smoking Lucky Strikes & had no houndstooth.
  • You had to get Jeff Sagarin & his iMac to declare you National Champions in 1950 (before integration).
  • Your cheerleading squad has won more titles than you, a fact your school proudly declares on your website.
  • You keep asking at games “When are they gonna put up basketball goals”
  • You have only gone to 12 bowl games in history.
  • Hal Mumme brought offense and probation with him.
  • Can’t beat Tennessee.
  • George Blanda is the last All-Pro your school has produced.
  • Tim Couch.

So you see, it could be worse Vols. Oh, and don’t worry Kentucky. Midnight Madness is on October 10th, Patrick Patterson is returning, and Ashton “I’m Rick James Bitch” Cobb is no longer on the team. Good times by all…

Oh and I know Kentucky is 4-0 so far, but beating such powerhouses like Middle Tennessee St., Western Kentucky, and Louisville only makes you champions of I-65…

Posted in College Football, Crime & Punishment, Kentucky Wildcats, NCAA, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee Volunteers, Tim Couch | Tagged: , , , , , | 5 Comments »

Resume Watch: After Hurricane Ike Edition

Posted by Joel on September 22, 2008

On a serious note, those less fortunate along the Texas coast can use whatever help you can give. You can donate money to the Red Cross by clicking here. Large amounts of products, such as diapers, toothbrushes, water, etc. can be made by clicking here.

Anyway, it is time for the following coach to update his resume. No, not a certain coach in Knoxville. I am sure plenty of fellow Vols are busy writing his resume for him. I am talking about mi amigo, and possibly the absolute worst hire at a major D-1A program this side of Coach O…

MY good buddy, Bill Stewart. The man who is supposed the lead the Mountaineers to the promise land. The guy who was supposed to lead the Mountaineer program to a national title. The genius that would turn Pat White into the pocket passer that Rodriguez couldn’t develop. The master of all things West By God Virginia.

Hey Thomas, remember all of those many comments from the Mountaineer faithful that came to the site the days leading to the Fiesta Bowl, and when Team Turmoil beat Oklahoma??? Where the hell are they now??? I said back then that the school decided to go with the one night stand instead of the sure thing. And now they sit 1-2. Looking at the remainder of the schedule, I see losses to Auburn and South Florida. I can see a possible upset to Louisville and UConn (man I can’t believe I said that). Howdy Doody.

So, Coach Bill Stewart, you are a nice guy. You are in over your head, but a nice guy. Unfortunately, all of those lonely couches in Morgantown are missing the warm embrace of kerosene and matches. They cannot burn themselves, and with you at the helm, I am afraid that instead of the fall smell that normally encompasses the air in West Virginia won’t be the sweet mix of cotton/polyester blends and pressboard. Instead, it will be the usual scent of coal, sulphur, meth, and depression. And there is no one else to blame but the meddling governor, the outgoing school president, and the inept AD. Country roads…

Posted in Big East, Bill Stewart, Coach Rich Rodriguez, College Football, Couch Burning, NCAA, Sports, WVU, West Virginia, West Virginia Mountaineers, boo birds, boosters, coach o, whiners | 1 Comment »

Resume Watch Week 2

Posted by Joel on September 8, 2008

Two coaches that should probably schedule moving trucks:

Al Groh: I know that Frank Beamer has owned Virginia forever, so he or Va. Tech fans probably don’t want to see him leave. But for all of the NFL talent that has gone through the halls of Virginia, he really hasn’t done much. I am sure Virginia fans will say that he deserves to still be head coach, the fact remains that a beautiful campus and hot but underrated co-eds will not get the players to run a 3 yard out on 3rd & 18. That is a result of coaching.

USC throttled the Cavs. That is understood. I get that, because USC is about to dismantle Slowhio Statein a few days. But when you have to use a QB who is on probation for alcohol possession and he tells his probation officer THAT HE IS STILL DRINKING & SMOKING WEED just days before the game against mighty (1-AA) Richmond, that is not good. However, knowing that the school will let you smoke weed and drink to your hearts content as long as you can suit up for Saturday will be great for recruiting.Up next is a road trip against the powerhouse UConn.

Tommy West: During his tenure at Memphis, West has guided the Tigers from piss poor to somewhat mediocre. Yes, they have played 2 bowl games in the Superdome (New Orleans Bowls, let us not kid ourselves), but when you let Rice score 29 points in the 4th quarter of a game you had in hand, it is time to get a rack of Interstate ribs before you leave town. Maybe West is learning lessons from the John Chavis Mustang Package.

Not only is it time for West to go, but it is really time for Memphis to assess a few things. Mainly, the basketball is making money hand over fist. The football team has more red ink on its P&L’s than a Rambo movie. If Memphis is going to play football, they cannot treat the program like it is just a time killer until basketball season starts. I can’t ever seeing the football program worth a damn. Marquette and Georgetown do not play D-1A football and they are financially successful as an athletic department. My grandmother used to say it is time to either shit or get off of the pot. For years, the Tiger program has been floating. I say the school needs to flush. Next on the Tigers schedule is Marshall.

Posted in ACC, College Football, Conference USA, Memphis, Memphis Tigers, NCAA, NFL Draft, Sports, Virginia Cavaliers | Tagged: , , , , | 1 Comment »

RIP Don Haskins

Posted by Joel on September 7, 2008

Don Haskins, longtime coach of Texas Western/UTEP, died at age 78. Due to the movie “Glory Road”, he and the Texas Western team received well overdue mainstream attention. God bless the Haskins family during this time…

Posted in NCAA, Sports | Tagged: , , , | Leave a Comment »

College Football Week 2 is in the books & here’s what I learned

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 7, 2008

First off everyone stop for a moment and point and laugh at the Big Least. The years of fooling the college football world with smoke and mirrors and weak scheduling are over.

WVU falls to East Carolina and it was never even close. Somewhere Rich Rodriguez is laughing because he never lost to East Carolina.

How hot is the name “Skip Holtz” right now? I’ve been to various teams message boards since yesterday and a lot teams whose coaches are in the hot seat want him. For example:…………………………………………………………………………………………………..

………………………………………………………………………..

  • South Carolina
  • Clemson
  • Tennessee
  • Syracuse
  • Arkansas
  • Louisville
  • Washington
  • Pittsburgh
  • Notre Dame

Speaking of Syracuse how is it pathetic to lose to Akron. Other Big Least fail boats are Uconn & Pittsburgh. Sure Uconn won yesterday but it took an overtime to beat Temple. Are you kidding me? And Pitt struggled with Buffalo.

The best team in the Big Least is Cincinnati. Sure they lost yesterday but it’s difficult to go to Oklahoma and win.

Oh yeah you can continue pointing and laughing at the ACC. Way to go Maryland.

Ohio State should drop in the polls due to their dismal performance against Ohio.

Miami will be scary good by the middle of this season. And what a rank amateur move it was on Urban Meyer’s part to kick that last field goal. He could have let Miami have the ball on the 10 yard line. That was disgraceful.

Something else that is disgraceful is the PAC 10 refs. What an idiotic call yesterday involving Washington and BYU.

Arkansas better step it up or they will not win a conference game all year.

Notre Dame Football still sucks. If San Diego St. didn’t make some stupid mistakes they would have won that game.

Under the raider teams

  • Nebraska
  • Mississippi (I always knew Coach 0 could recruit now they have a coach.)
  • Clemson they will bounce back
  • Air Force
  • F$U
  • Cal
  • Georgia Tech
  • Iowa
  • Purdue
  • Oklahoma State
  • Vandy
  • TCU
  • Kansas St.
  • Arizona
  • Indiana

Teams that impressed

  • East Carolina
  • Wisconsin
  • Georgia
  • Oregon
  • Kentucky
  • Cal
  • Miami in a loss that game was closer than what the score dictates
  • Texas
  • Oklahoma
  • Missouri
  • TCU

Teams that failed to impress

  • Ohio State
  • Michigan
  • Illinois
  • Auburn
  • Texas A&M
  • Arkansas
  • Alabama
  • Kansas
  • South Florida
  • Utah
  • Texas Tech.
  • Texas

Schools that might be looking a new coach next year

  • Arkansas
  • Syracuse (that guy is a goner)
  • Pitt (him to)
  • Texas A&M
  • Tennessee (I had to)
  • Michigan
  • Washington
  • Colorado
  • Notre Dame
  • Virginia
  • Maryland
  • Memphis
  • Louisville

Even the water girls of Ole Miss are hotties much like their cheerleaders.

The Miami cheerleaders are hot in a soft-core porn sort of way

Georgia’s cheerleaders are so-so

Posted in Air Force, Alabama Crimson Tide, Arkansas Razorbacks, Auburn, BCS, BYU, Big East, Big Twelve Football, Cal, Clemson Tigers, Colorado Buffalos, Conference USA, East Carolina Pirates, FSU, Florida Gators, Florida State Seminoles, Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets, Houston Nutt, Iowa Hawkeyes, K-State, Kansas State Wildcats, Kentucky Wildcats, Louisville Cardinals, Maryland, Memphis Tigers, Michigan Wolverines, Missouri Tigers, Nebraska Cornhuskers, Notre Dame Fighting Irish, Oklahoma sooners, Pac 10 football, Penn State Nittany Lions, Pitt Panthers, SEC Football, Skip Holtz, South Florida Bulls, Sports, Tennessee Volunteers, Texas Christian, Texas Longhorns, Texas Tech Red Raiders, The Big East, Uconn, Uga, University of California berkeley, University of South Florida, Urban Meyer, Vanderbilt Commodores, Virginia Cavaliers, Wake Forest, War Eagle, Washington Huskies, big ten football, fire philip fulmer, kansas jayhawks, notre dame sucks, ohio state buckeyes, ole miss rebels, refs, tOSU | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Resume Watch

Posted by Joel on September 5, 2008

I know it is early in the college football landscape, but after this weekend’s orgy of football watching, there were two coaches who stood above the pile of horrible coaching. One of these guys should have been gone last year, and the other one will be gone due to a difficult schedule & young players.

Dave Wannstedt: Some say he should have been gone last year, even with the win against West Virginia. Some say he should not have been hired at all, especially if you look at his “success” with the Chicago Bears & Miami Dolphins. He has shown that he can recruit but cannot coach. Not a good combination, especially in the cream puff heavy Big East. At the very least, with the facilities and boosters that Pitt has, the Panthers should be just behind West Virginia and South Florida. Alas, they are busy pillow fighting with UConn for mediocrity. I would hire him as a defensive coach/recruiting coordinator when he gets fired but nothing more. He should not have gotten this head coaching job in the first place.

Ty Willingham: This one hurts to write. I think Ty Willingham is a good coach who got the shaft at that blasphemous school in South Bend. But he has a young team that got throttled in the second half of Saturday’s game vs. Oregon. Now the Pac-10 is a good conference. Besides USC, you have those tree hugging hippies at Cal, Uncle Phil’s Nike money at Oregon, hot chicks at Arizona St. (to entice recruits), and an up and coming UCLA team. In other words, Willingham can’t be bad. He has a good young QB in Jake Locker, but from what I saw Saturday, they need receivers that can catch more than staph infections. The team is young, and looking at the schedule for the rest of the year, I see 10 losses easily. No way the alums in Seattle go for that.

There are others that I could have put on here like Greg Robinson of Syracuse or Chuck Long of San Diego St. but these were 2 games that I saw glaring needs of regime change.

Posted in BCS, Big East, College Football, Dave Wannstedt, NCAA, Pitt Panthers, Sports, Washington Huskies, tyrone Willingham | Leave a Comment »

The Sarah Palin Video still lives here! Big Hair Rules!

Posted by Thomas the Terrible on September 4, 2008

Well well well…the Republican party has managed to take all the Sarah Palin videos off YouTube some fives days after I posted it! Well…where there’s a will there is a way!! The video still lives here bitches!!!

Posted in Sports | Tagged: , , | 4 Comments »

Uh Oh…

Posted by Joel on September 4, 2008

After watching the game against UCLA, I am sad. Not because Tennessee lost, but looking at the schedule, guess who’s coming to Knoxville on Sept. 20. I think I might call in to work that following Monday, because the Jack Daniel’s will flow like the river that day…

Posted in College Football, Go Vols, NCAA, SEC, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee Volunteers | 2 Comments »

Yup…It’s Time…

Posted by Joel on September 4, 2008

No, we here at the site are not endorsing Obama, McCain, or any other candidate for President. Nor are we trying to say that Fulmer is a supporter of Obama, as far as we know.

This post is about one thing, and one thing that I as a long time fan of things Rocky Top thought I would not post: changes need to occur. Fulmer needs to go.

It was this time last year that, as a matter of fact 1 year ago, that I wrote this piece. It was after the UT-Cal game. I was truly in a dark place, a place that I arrived in by a lethal combination of Jack Daniel’s and a 3 month baby girl. Having a headache from liquor and crying kids is not a good combination. However, the seeds of my discontent were not sewn during that game, but back during the mid-90′s. Yes, the “glory” years of Tennessee football. Remember when Steve Spurrier famously said “You can’t spell Citrus without UT”??? Man that hurt, but it pretty much was the truth. Look at Fulmer’s record vs. Florida. Spurrier got a sick twisted pleasure flinging around the football against Tennessee. Those seeds were sewn during every completion that was caught by Green, Caldwell, Taylor, etc.

Peyton couldn’t beat Florida. True, but Fulmer couldn’t beat Florida either. Guess what??? It ain’t happening this year either. Florida has recently discovered that a running back can be more than an extra blocker for Tebow.

Georgia has owned UT since Richt got to Athens. Fulmer has owned Alabama, but the way things play out, not anymore with Satan coaching them.

The seeds of change have been sewn by all of the close losses over the years. Anyone remember the Notre Dame loss at Knoxville??? That game helped propel the legend of Brady Quinn, nevermind the blowout the next year in South Bend. Can’t forget Memphis in 1996 (I thought the Liberty Bowl would burn down after that one). What about the close wins versus Mississippi State, Vanderbilt, Ole Miss, South Carolina, Kentucky??? By and large, for the past 16 years, the dominant teams in the SEC have been (in no particular order) UT, LSU, Florida, Alabama, and Georgia. All of the other teams have decent years, but with all of the 1st and 2nd round draft picks that have played in Neyland Stadium, there is no way that Tennessee should have had blowout losses against few teams, much less Notre Dame a couple of years ago, Alabama last year, and Maryland in 2002 (Peach Bowl). Tennessee should have a lot better record for the past 16 years. Fulmer has more of a reputation of making Heisman Trophy candidates, like McGahee, Couch, McFadden, Grossman, etc.

My point is this: Fulmer has lived his time. Name another street after him. Name a luxury suite after him. Name Cell Block E of the Knoxville jail after him. But he needs to go. The past 6 years has shown that Mike Hamilton has been content for being good and not great. Pat Summitt is pretty much as untouchable as Smokey. Bruce Pearl has Tennessee basketball relevant and on a way upward trend. At this point, if Tennessee wins the national championship this year (quit laughing Thomas), I will still call for Fulmer’s job. I am fed up. I am sick of the goal line fumbles, the brilliance of Randy Sanders Dave Clawson’s play calling, the every other year of John Chavis having a good defense, the miscues on special teams, and the stubbornness of staying the course and “working like heck”. If a fan of another team makes fun of Fulmer being fat, whatever, he is. If another fan says “Man there is a lot of talent on the Vols. Why is the school happy to not play in BCS bowls??? What if Tressel had this speed??? Stoops himself couldn’t blow a Fiesta Bowl with your guy’s players.” It is sad, and I can’t take it anymore. Real change involves pink slips, and this Fulmer cat is out of lives. He can’t pull the “it is the coordinator’s fault” card. Eventually, you have to look at the man who hires the coordinator. The roots are grown, and harvest time is coming…

Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, College Football, Crime & Punishment, Florida Gators, Football Poll, Fulmer, Go Vols, NCAA, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports, Tennessee, Tennessee Volunteers, UT vols, football, fulmer sucks, vols | Leave a Comment »

St. Nick the Even Keel

Posted by Little Bear Cub on September 1, 2008

Bama’s Back Ass Wipes!!!!!!!!!!!! I almost want to cry…………

Posted in Alabama Crimson Tide, NCAA, SEC, SEC Coaches, SEC Football, Sports | 1 Comment »